Our Relationship is Built on Friendship
On a balmy afternoon in 2002 when Bamidele Onalaja stepped into the bustling Alausa mini market, his spirit was lifted by the prospect of clinching a deal. After weeks of persuasive pitches, the Iyaloja of Alausa mini market had finally agreed to purchase his company’s wired lines, promising a much-needed boost to his finances.
With a spring in his step, Bamidele navigated through the maze of stalls toward the market shade where his potential customer usually held court. However, his anticipation came to an abrupt halt as he reached his destination. Instead of the familiar face of the Iyaloja, a striking young woman sat in her place, engrossed in a book. Mesmerised by her presence, Bamidele momentarily forgot his purpose- lost in admiration.
When he finally gathered his thoughts, he politely inquired about the whereabouts of his customer, only to learn that she had embarked on a pilgrimage to Jerusalem.
The couple also provides education and scholarship to indigent children, child and maternal healthcare, widow’s empowerment, among others through their foundation, Chris Bamidele Onalaja Foundation (CBOF).
“You’ll have to come back some other time,” the young woman, named Tolu, informed him.
Rather than taking his leave, Bamidele felt an inexplicable pull to stay, as if his destiny was rooted in her presence. It was then that he noticed the book in Tolu’s hands—an offering from his own pastor, Chris Oyakhilome, the esteemed leader of Loveworld Incorporated and founder of Christ Embassy.
“That’s my pastor,” Bamidele exclaimed, a spark of enthusiasm igniting within him.
Tolu, puzzled by his lingering presence, offered a warm smile, inviting further interaction. “That’s my pastor too,” she said. Their love story blossomed from that initial conversation and continues to unfold. Despite facing typical romcom challenges, such as Bamidele’s humble beginnings contrasting with Tolu’s family expectations, they persevered. Tolu, the only daughter in her family, faced pressure regarding marriage, but Bamidele was unwavering in his desire to build a future with her from the very beginning, proving that theirs was a love destined to conquer all.
Sitting across from each other in their tastefully furnished office in Ikeja, their eyes sparkled with love as they reminisced about their journey together. Tolu took the lead in narrating their love story, with Bamidele chiming in occasionally to add his perspective. Their shared glances and gentle smiles revealed a deep connection that has stood the test of time.
“We exchanged numbers and in one of those conversations, I told him that I was looking for a job,” Tolu said, recounting how her husband helped her to land her first job. “I had just finished my NYSC in Bonny, Rivers State.”
Calling himself a sharp guy, Bamidele arranged for Tolu to secure a job at his workplace, albeit in a different branch. However, he had not yet revealed his romantic intentions towards her at that point.
“It was when I got to the office that I realised that he had an intention. Everyone started greeting me with such familiarity. In my mind, I kept wondering what he told them. Did he tell them I was his girlfriend or something?”
He patiently waited until they began working together before finally revealing his intention to marry Tolu. Initially, she dismissed his proposal, accusing him of trying to leverage his influence in securing her job to win her affection. Despite her initial skepticism, Bamidele remained undeterred in his pursuit of her heart.
“I’m a very determined man so I took it as one of those things women say to discourage men because she wants to make sure that you are serious. Even if she loves you at first sight, she wants to let you know that she is not an easy catch.”
Tolu also had other suitors who boasted flashy cars and prestigious jobs, including a banker who showered her with crisp notes during their encounters.
“He usually meets them when he comes around.”
Bamidele, who lacked a car at the time, captured Tolu’s heart with his selflessness and spiritual depth. Despite the concerns of her friends, Tolu saw beyond material possessions, recognising the true value of Bamidele’s character.
“I remember when I started working with him. You know I had just rounded up my NYSC and I had no corporate outfits. From his little salary, he took me to Ikeja under the bridge to buy me some ‘bend down select’ clothes. He spent N16,000 on me that day and I knew his salary was just N20,000. So, in my head, I’m thinking if he can make such a sacrifice for me, he would spend the whole world on me if he has more. That was what got me hooked.”
“Hooked for life,” chimed in Bamidele. “She forgot to add that I was very handsome, ‘he said amusingly, “with a very big head.” Tolu gazed at him affectionately, as if reminiscing about the early days of their romance. Like her, Bamidele was drawn to her deep devotion to God.
“She is very energetic and hardworking. I saw that from the beginning. Even when my elder sister saw her, she approved of her immediately because of her good character traits.”
The couple faced financial struggles from the beginning, so when Tolu’s father planned to visit her future husband, they hastily rented a cramped apartment in a tenement building in Festac Town.
“It was her mother that gave us the money to complete the rent,” said Bamidele. “The house was so small that even the kitchen could not contain a pot and when it rains, we cry every night because there was water everywhere.”
The less-than-ideal living conditions did not appeal to Tolu’s father, who expressed disappointment and attempted to dissuade his daughter from a life of hardship, even though he liked Bamidele. However, Tolu remained resolute in her decision to build a life with Bamidele.
“It was so funny because I was used to cooking in a gas cooker but my husband has a stove.” Eventually, the couple upgraded to a better living situation. Bamidele secured a job at a real estate company in Agbara, which spurred his passion for the industry.
Today, they co-own the innovative real estate development company, RevolutionPlus, with estates spanning across Nigeria and the United States.
Their love for each other is evident in their business endeavours. Portraits of the couple adorned the white walls of their Ikeja office, serving as a testament to their partnership. One frame in particular holds special significance, as Bamidele attributed every milestone achievement in his life to his wife.
Indeed, Tolu has played a pivotal role in his success. When he faced job loss, she took charge of the family’s financial responsibilities, even starting a cleaning company to make ends meet. She not only encouraged him to pursue his real estate aspirations but also convinced his uncle to invest in their venture at the outset. At one juncture, she made the sacrifice of leaving her lucrative job to provide unwavering support to her husband.
“My wife has helped me achieve so many things,” he emphasised. “She is my partner in most of the decisions I have made in life.”
Addressing the challenges they’ve encountered in their business, “Particularly with the several online complaints about land allocations,” Tolu highlighted the difficulty of providing affordable housing in Nigeria. She emphasised the issue of families reselling lands already purchased at a certain price, along with subscribers’ limited knowledge of land ownership, as major obstacles.
“There are many real estate developers who abscond with people’s money and go through worse things but we don’t see them in the media. Sometimes, people go on the internet to claim that they have paid us for their lands and we are yet to allocate them, but by the time we go through their documents, we realise that they have not made full payments.”
Bamidele added: “The landowners also constitute a problem. You can buy plots of land from a family for a certain amount, and later another family comes up, claiming that they have a court judgement to reclaim the land. We now have to pay an additional amount to repossess the land, and so forth. Now do I go back to tell the subscriber this is what has happened and they need to pay extra? I’m already running at a loss.”
Despite the shortcomings, Bamidele remains steadfast in his vision to provide affordable housing. However, he revealed that the company has expanded its operations to include luxury housing, as well as ventures in the hospitality and food industries.
The year 2024 holds significant milestones for the Onalajas. RevolutionPlus will celebrate its 10th anniversary, the couple will mark their 20th wedding anniversary in October, and Bamidele will reach the golden age milestone in May. It’s a year of celebration for the couple.
Reflecting on their journey, the Onalajas attributed the strength of their relationship to their deep friendship, which has not only made them successful partners in marriage but also in business.