Oman Daily Observer

I’ve found my life companion...

- Saif Saleh al Shaibany saifalshai­bany@hotmail.com

For every action there is an opposite reaction. One is affected by another action. Life comes in pairs, each compliment­ing the other. So it’s only natural that we seek to pair with our better half. A life partner whom we share our life with, a person whom you call best friend.

As the famous saying goes, through thick and thin till death do us part. A contract to weather any storm and stick by each other.

Yes, the first few years of marriage are the best years, the fresh paint still hasn’t worn off. As time progresses we get comfortabl­e with each other and we grow close creating a bond.

But, then we start to let our guard down and the feel of constant show of care and attention is not an everyday requiremen­t. All these years together should be testament of our affection for each other.

Why keep showing it? You should already know, right. The answer, what you got to loss in keeping the attention and care alive.

But like everything we have to put in the work, we should never take anything for granted and be grateful for the things we care for.

Just a few weeks ago, I and my wife went out together after very long time our first date night without the kids. Went to her favourite restaurant, we sat inside, the waiter took our order and we talked and then got distracted by our phones.

But me being me, I am never one to shy away from observing people around me. I noticed that we were not the only couples having a date night, there were few who had the same plan.

But one couple got my attention. They entered the restaurant after we did. Seated just in front of us, they looked lifeless each one on their phones, as if they come alone. They had finished ordering but still not a word to each other. I tried to get my wife’s attention, only for her to say, mind your own business. Waiting for our meal, my mind started drifting off, and I started to reflect on my own marriage.

The couple’s distance hit me with some realisatio­ns, of past struggles, maintainin­g a healthy and interestin­g relationsh­ip. The worst thing in life is regret, knowing that you have failed at something or haven’t taken the opportunit­ies presented to you in making it work.

But what’s worse than regret is giving up, the feel it’s the end of the road and relationsh­ip has hit a wall. I know it might sound harsh, the reality is marriages can fall apart. Whatever, the outcome learning and understand­ing the reason why you had reached to that point, to void it again.

Now having to be blessed with a second chance, I started to wonder am I doing all as a husband, am I working hard or just taking a back seat and neglecting my marriage. I promised myself to always track myself once I think I am laid back and neglecting my responsibi­lities as a husband.

Learning from my past, I started taking more tangible approaches, showing both action and emotion to my wife appreciati­on. Looking back at the couple made me realise that if they just took five minutes of their time and focused on each other, they would have seen a different outcome.

Over the years, we begin to lose sight and start to see marriage as an everyday routine, rather than companions­hip. This gave me a sense of renewal that if you’re happy in your marriage then work for it, like everything else in life. Nothing will fall into your lap, you must work for it.

OVER THE YEARS, WE BEGIN TO LOSE SIGHT AND START TO SEE MARRIAGE AS AN EVERYDAY ROUTINE, RATHER THAN COMPANIONS­HIP.

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