WHEN YOUR EMPLOYEE DISCLOSES A MENTAL HEALTH CONDITION

WHEN one of your direct reports has the courage to talk to you about a mental health condition, how you respond is critical. You want that employee to know you appreciate his sharing while also reassuring him that his job is not at risk.

At the same time, you need to figure out what impact, if any, this will have on your team and its members' workload. What do you say right away? What questions do you ask? How do you decide what accommodations, if any, to make?

It’s important to keep in mind that the employee likely had to overcome a lot of fear to talk with you about this topic. “The person has done something difficult and risky by raising this issue. In most cases, a tremendous amount of thought has gone into the decision,” says Kelly Greenwood, founder and CEO of Mind Share Partners, a nonprofit that focuses on changing the culture of workplace mental health. “The disclosure decision is complex,” says Susan Goldberg, core doctoral faculty member at Fielding Graduate University, and it depends on the individual’s personal situation, the particular employer and societal issues.

How you handle such interactions is critical. The good news is that these can be productive conversations, as long as you follow a few pieces of advice:

Thank them for telling you

START off by acknowledging the effort it took for the employee to tell you. But don’t make it a big deal. Your goal should be to normalize the topic as much as possible. Greenwood says that even if this is the first time you’re having a conversation like this, they happen all the time. “Your reaction shouldn’t convey, ‘This is a big serious issue,’ because that could increase their shame or fear about their future,” she says. Goldberg also cautions against being overly emotional. “You don’t want the employee to have to deal with your reaction,” she explains.

Listen

GIVE your employee the space to speak freely and tell you what he needs in terms of accommodations. Pay attention to your nonverbal cues. “If you’re acting skittish or uncomfortable, it’s discouraging for your employee because it sends a message that you don’t want to talk about it,” says Greenwood. Hold back from asking a ton of questions, especially ones that require that the person disclose more information than you need. Let your employee lead the way in how much he wants to tell you.

Offer support—but don’t overpromise

IT can be tempting to tell your employee that you’ll do whatever it takes to support him, but you want to tread carefully. Maybe your employee is just sharing the information to keep you in the loop, says Goldberg, and doesn't need you to make any adjustments. Don’t make assumptions. If the person asks for time off or changes to the work schedule, be careful not to overpromise. Feel free to take some time to process the information. Greenwood suggests you say something like, “Thank you so much for sharing. Let me take some time to digest and get back to you on X day.”

Don’t make it about you

IT’S possible that you or someone you’re close with has been through a similar experience to the one your employee has shared with you, but you shouldn't focus the conversation on you. Keep in mind that people are different in terms of how their condition shows up, says Greenwood. That said, sometimes sharing a personal story can help to normalize the topic. If you have the kind of relationship with the employee where you share personal stories, just be sure that what you share is hopeful.

Maintain confidentiality

REASSURE the employee that you will make every effort to honor confidentiality but that you may need to speak with human resources. If the person is uncomfortable with that, says Greenwood, it might be helpful to explain the reason for this, such as wanting to ensure that the employee gets legal protections and access to all the company’s resources and possible accommodations. Still, keep the information to yourself as much as possible. “It’s tempting to talk to others about it for your own emotional support—or to explain why you’re moving work around—but it’s not OK unless the employee expressly gives you permission to disclose,” says Greenwood. In some cases, the employee may give you permission or even ask you to let others know. If they do, make sure that you are clear in any communication that the person has asked you to tell others.

After the disclosure, you will want to consider ways in which you can help your employee take care of his mental health. Greenwood says it’s important for managers to know the difference between “accommodations,” which are formal exceptions to existing policies for a specific employee after a disclosure, and “adaptations,” which are proactive adjustments that can be made for everyone and are within the company’s policies, such as flexible hours. If you need to make accommodations for an employee, it’s critical to involve HR. Talk with the employee about how they would prefer you address any concerns that may be raised by other workers about potential changes to the schedule and workload shifts that may affect the team's operations.

We’d all like to work for managers whom we feel comfortable talking to when we need help. Unfortunately, that’s not always the case. But you can make it more likely that people will come to you by being a role model. Greenwood emphasizes the importance of leaders and managers talking openly about their issues. “You don’t necessarily have to talk about your own mental health condition if you have one, but it could be about your child having a hard time sleeping, or concerns you have about burning out. You want to show that managers are fallible and human,” she says. Being vulnerable in this way gives people a small opening so they in turn feel more comfortable sharing. And, if you hold a powerful position in your organization, sharing your personal experience can go a long way toward demonstrating that it’s possible to succeed at the highest levels even if you have a mental health condition.