Buen Camino! The journey

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WHEN I signed up to go with my family on the camino to Santiago de Compostela, I only had a very vague idea of what I was getting myself into. I knew it was going to be a spiritual journey of sorts, where I would become a pilgrim for ten days. I knew there would be a lot of walking (an average of 15 kilometers a day, more or less), and that it would be strenuous and exhausting, to say the very least. But what I did not expect was how rough some of the terrain would be; how dependent and affected one’s journey can be by either glorious or the most unforgiving of weather conditions.

The booklet for pilgrims prepared and given to us by our guides Marly Camino contained some daily reflections, and one of them would resonate the most with me after I injured my ankle traversing slippery, rough, and rocky terrain during the second stage of the first day: “The Camino de Santiago is a personal experience since each one starts the journey as they are… Nobody contributes the same things, nobody expects the same things, and although you may not find what you are looking for, each one completes their journey. There are as many Caminos as there are people. Each person must be open so they can find their own Way.”

For lack of a better, more apt term, I have been lampa from the day I was born. I have always likened myself to Humpty Dumpty as I am capable of tripping, even when just simply standing up. I never had the best sense of balance or coordination, nor was I ever athletic. In fact, physical education was always the culprit in bringing down my GPA in school. Yet, for some reason, this never swayed my desire, or stopped me from going on the Camino. As people teased, and cautioned me to be extra careful knowing my accident prone ways, I laughed it off, and as always, took it with a grain of salt. The moment I twisted my ankle, I knew right there and then that it could possibly be “the end” of my walk, but I threaded along a few more kilometers up a hill, and down some slopes to complete, at the very least, that stage. And though I was slightly upset at myself, while I waited for the rest of my family to finish their walk for the day, it was almost as if God had sent me a message. I had a sudden urge to read the pilgrims booklet, and that’s when I came across that verse I shared above. Just like that, I felt a sense of enlightenment – while the walking may have come to a halt for me, my camino was far from over. I would use the next few days to still go on and reflect on “my way.”

And at that moment I decided to accept I was injured fully, so many realizations came upon me. As I found myself sitting in the middle of a town waiting for the rest of my family to reach that point, or as I was alone in the bus in the middle of a forest, I let thoughts come to me. Although my personal Camino experience is extremely different from that of the norm, my realizations, I feel, can somehow still be generalized by most. For one, despite the unfortunate circumstance at the onset that resulted in an injury, I know I am blessed. Blessed to be able to even reach this point, and be on this trip, far, far away from the distractions of the “real world” – not only to introspect, but to be given precious time to bond with my aunts (and uncles) who I have grown up around, but who, until this trip, I never really had the chance to heavily bond with on a daily basis. I am fortunate to be part of a family that, though pre-dominantly (alpha) female, is fiercely loyal, and reminds me every day of why my definition and value of family is what it is. It is an experience of a lifetime I feel I could not have done with any other group of people (and I think the feeling is mutual) simply because of the staunch support each other’s sole physical presence was capable of providing.

Through it all, I realized that the journey of the Camino, at the very least, is a metaphor for life itself – there will always be twists and turns, uphill slopes and downward curves, steep inclines and deadly rough unexpected patches in the middle of nowhere that are seemingly impossible at that given moment. But in the end, the magic in it all is discovering oneself – turning doubts into beliefs, getting questions answered, and ultimately, discovering what lies in an otherwise uncertain path. Learning that going the road less traveled will never get you to your destination the quickest, but oftentimes it is what is the most meaningful.

In my journey, I learned to let go – to rid myself of the “shouldve’s, couldve’s and wouldve’s” of this world, and instead, to respect my limits and capabilities. To work around, rather than against my weaknesses, and to recognize the fact that there is – and that there will always be – a greater power. As another reflection on the pilgrim’s booklet read, “Hitting the road requires a fundamental attitude of abandonment – being at the mercy of something greater than oneself. It is to stop oneself from being the focal point of one’s life. To overcome that natural selfishness that keeps us from growing… Abandonment is not laziness, it is collaboration, taking personal responsibility, but accepting your own limits.” It dawned on me to be grateful that nothing worse happened to me (or to anyone else on the trip) than a sprained ankle.

I write this reflection I choose to share with all of you a swollen ankle, and ten days later. And although I still feel slightly beaten physically, I am definitely not broken (still in one piece) and have never felt stronger spiritually. Simply to bask in the company of your loved ones, and immerse oneself in an experience as such where there is no other way to turn to but to “home,” it is a bonding experience like no other I am glad I embarked on.

I end this reflection with the last paragraph on the card given to us on the first day because I feel like my thoughts could not be summarized, or worded better: “Everything that happens on a daily basis is significant and unrepeatable in its own way. It will have a special meaning throughout your life. It is an experience that is not limited to its duration, but one that accompanies you forever.”

And that is the long-lasting impact MY Camino has had on me.

*** Special thanks to MARLY CAMINO for arranging everything, and making sure our Camino would be one that we would remember forever. A shout out to the most patient tour guide ever, German Cruzado, and our bus driver, Juan Carlos Gonzalez. To learn more about Marly Camino, you may visit their Instagram account @marlycamino.