'It's Like This' by Boy Abunda: a book review

was right about! Ateneo was the best school. It was not easy inside and outside of the classroom. But I sharpened my fangs!” And this precious one-liner, apropos being surrounded by rich and fair-skinned classmates: “At the Ateneo, I realized that I could be a first- rate social climber.” There he met Nini Santos-Borja, who was kind when some were not, and who remains a devoted friend to this day, almost 40 years after they first met in school.

But Boy’s father died young, and his beloved mother brought up Boy and his sister Mana Fe on a public school teacher’s salary. His father’s death left a hole in his heart that has not quite been filled. He plunged into work to make both ends meet – and to forget his depression.

“I sold encyclopedia sets, fire extinguishers and hair care products. I worked in the kitchen, opened restaurant doors and guided noisy tourists. Every day, no matter how bruised and broken I felt, I was moving on and moving forward.”

His life changed when he strayed into the Metropolitan Theatre and met Conchita Sunico, the doyenne of Manila’s crème de la crème and head of public relations at the Met. Charmed by Boy’s motor mouth and the fact that he could think quickly on his feet, she hired him as her PR staff. And when Boy, who was already walking down the grand stairways, returned and asked her what one did in PR, Ms Sunico answered: “I will teach you.”

And so she did. But Boy did not only work at PR, he also appeared in the plays as part of the choir, begging the director if he could utter a one- liner like “Mabuhay ang bagong kasal!” or “

But like sponge soaking it all, he learned talent management later because of his PR training, and mastered talk show hosting because of theater. Not a second was wasted in the post- Ateneo education of Boy Abunda.

The book is also filled with sharp observations on Philippine gay life. Thought # 56 says: “Gay love is equal to all forms of human love.” Thought # 58 gives us advice on how to deal with gays who wish to remain closeted. “It is the choice of a gay person to stay in the closet. It is a right that must be respected by hecklers and bullies. Bullies perish.”

This book is also an homage to his father and mother, who loved him unconditionally even if he were gay. Both parents being born poor, they knew the value of education for social mobility.

His mother taught Boy to have courage and determination. Thought # 64 recalled that “As a child, Nanay used to run 24 kilometers to and from school. In her sturdy, tiny hands, she would protectively hold her pair of wooden bakya [ clogs] that she would only wear as soon as she reached the school gate.”

This steely determination he uses as a prism for his insight on show business. Thought #73 said that “the biggest star is not always the best. He or she is the one who lasts.” The essay called “How to Manage a Public Figure” is filled with sharp observations and barbed wit. At first, the bewildered talent just follows. But when the talent becomes the boss, why then, the power relation changes.

“Fame changes the celebrity’s world. Fame is toxic. It can be deadly and poisonous. It is seductive. It changes people. To a certain extent, fame defines the hierarchy of relationships in show business.”

These observation apply not only to show business but also to politics, especially in this day and age of Fake News when hundreds of thousands, or even a million, followers in social media make bloggers think they are already famous. But for how long?"