Expat rues his marriage to a Filipino woman

Dear Emily,

Ten years ago I married a Filipino woman in the Philippines. I met her online and got her a spouse’s visa to the United Kingdom. She was from a poor family but had a job at the provincial government.

After three years working as a care assistant in the United Kingdom, she started dating men via the internet, and started telling me lies. This after I had built her a four-bedroom house in the Philippines. She now has her family squatting in the house, and most of my personal property has gone missing.

I know of many other ex- pats who have similar stories to tell. My advice is to be very careful and never to buy property in the Philippines as it will never be yours to own. Al- so, that the family comes first, not the husband. It was a bad day the day I met her. STEVE

Of the probably millions of Filipino women who have married foreigners, you’re adding to the growing number of men who are crying foul and want a refund. There could be some statistics to build a case on this widening misfortune.

How about your marriage from her perspective? Frustration? Regret? Sadness?

But aren’t marriages, as a whole and in general these days, becoming a revolving door to many? Married now, divorced tomorrow—and the ensuing bitterness is just horrendous. Much like yours?

Hindsight is truly 20-20. You could have considered a condo unit instead, then claimed it for your own.

There are many expats who’d swear the Filipino women they married turned out to be great wives and mothers. Ideal, even. Everything they’ve heard them to be.

Yes, you’d be forgiven for cursing the day you met your wife. It’s just your luck of the draw to have married a nightmare.