MORE THAN 42
Rape numbers are worst, all over, and victimizing our children
Advocates against child abuse are warning: Do not just look at Davao City and the numbers. Incest rape is worse than ever and it is leaps and bounds beyond the 42 cases that placed the city as having the most number of rape cases in the second quarter of 2018. The victims are mostly children, and it is happening everywhere.
This was shared by Sr. Edna B. Gado of the Sisters of Mary, the case management officer of Talikala Inc., and Jeanette Laurel-Ampog, the executive director of Talikala.
Talikala works with
prostituted women and children.
Their cases show that around 80 percent of prostituted children started with being raped mostly by family members or close neighbors. (“Kay nabasa na man, maligo na lang [Since we already got wet, we might as well take a bath].”)
But very few are reported, such that both Sr. Edna and Laurel-Ampog belittle the 42 cases.
“Especially in rural area where there are no opportunities for the victims to seek assistance and many child abuse cases are subsumed as cultural practices, it can be more than 42,” Laurel-Ampog said. There is also the honor of the family, the vulnerability of the child and dependence on the perpetrator, and a lot of other factors.
Still, ensuring that rape victims get justice can be a practice in futility, especially when perpetrators are family members.
The two recalled an 11-yearold boy raped by a neighbor and who consequently contracted sexually transmitted infection (STI). This could have been a sure-win case, but the mother backed out and never returned with the child when in the interview it was found out that two uncles have abused the boy, long before the neighbor did.
“Families are bent on filing a case when the perpetrators are outsiders. But kung pamilya na, maundang gyud (But when family members are involved, they will back out),” Sr. Edna said.
There was also the case of a couple, both senior police of- ficers, whose three daughters were being raped by the father, but whose children opted to just keep quiet even though their policewoman-mother already knew because it was drummed into them that the honor of the family and the promotion of the father was on the line.
These are but two. Sr. Edna is handling more than 200 cases from all over Mindanao. Talikala, while focused on Davao City, has been receiving case referrals from all over. This could be because of their well-publicized advocacies and could also be the reason why Davao City ranks high on the number of cases -- the willingness to come out is there because there is a support system in place.
Both said that given the slow pace of justice and the pressures a child victim has to endure from all over, their primary focus is in redeeming the child’s self-esteem and value of self.
“Ang bata na 8 years old, mag10 na lang, wala gihapon nagsugod ang kaso (An 8-year-old child already turned 10, and yet the case has not yet started to prosper in court),” Sr. Edna said. “Ang mahitabo, sa middle ng kaso, magpabayad na lang sa kadugay (What happens is that the complainant will decide to settle amicably because of the length of time spent on litigation).”
She recalled a case they handled where the victim is from a remote village and the perpetrator has already victimized others. Fare going to and from the court is already P200, she said. The family opted to settle after a while.
That is why, they said, they are continuing with their community programs teaching families and children on “touching rules”, teaching them the difference between the safe touch, the confusing touch (which grooms the child to accept advances), and the unsafe touch (which leads to rape), to prevent rape.
“The community has to be involved. The participation of the community is vital because there are many cases where the neighbors already know but no one dares speak out,” Laurel-Ampog said.
The ideal would be to change the mindset that men can have sex with anybody they desire. It should be accepted rape exists because there are rapists. But they have to address the problem on hand, as well.
It’s a cultural thing and it is victimizing the children more and more. Throw in illegal drugs into the equation and the psychological effects of being a victim, and the situation goes out of hand.
It’s so embedded into our psyche such that it manifests in our language, Sr. Edna said. It’s normal to hear comments made to children refering to their sexual organs (e.g.: “Dako na imo bi--ng, dalaga na gyud ka”/ “Dako na ang ot-n, pwede na mag-girlfriend”). In retrospect, even the joke that the reason why there are many rape cases is because there are many beautiful women by the President is but a manifestation of this deeply-embedded cultural warp.
The only way is for the individuals and the community to stand up and say: Stop.