The Freeman

Just say yes!

- Jaris Martinez Boc

My name is Jaris Martinez Boc, 26 years old, a mother of six, and I am six months pregnant. I bet you won’t believe that! But this is how Nico, my colleague, introduces me to new people in a creative way!

He is telling me his point – that you want someone to remember you by making a good first impression. What is a funny, interestin­g, or creative way to introduce yourself? So I was nodding to him and realizing I really have no idea how to uniquely introduce myself.

Introducti­ons have always been tricky for me. But here I am, honored to do an Ice Breaker Speech. Let us do this!

My name is Jaris. People confuse or mispronoun­ce my name all the time!

I even pause before telling baristas my name, as I silently

contemplat­e giving an easy-to-pronounce alias, which probably just makes me look sketchy! My name is derived from my father’s work place back then in Papua New Guinea. People call me Ja, or Jar, or Jars. My mother calls me “Kulot.” She is being literal.

I spent years battling my quiet temperamen­t, trying to become the extroverte­d personalit­y people wanted me to be. While I appreciate the need of speaking in front of the crowd, I also recognize the natural strengths of being quiet.

I am originally from Davao. I went to college clueless about what to study, why I was there, and what opportunit­ies I should be looking for. My mother suggested for me to take an HRM degree for me to work abroad and get better pay. So I say yes. However, as time passed, I found it hard to motivate myself when the modules were things I did not even have an interest in. I said to myself, “Just because I don’t like it now does not mean I will always feel this way.” So I carried on.

When I was on my fourth year, I decided to study and work at the same time, so I landed my first full-time BPO job. Then I found it so challengin­g. Work prevented me from fully devoting myself to my studies that I almost failed to graduate on time because of a failing subject. But by the time I was finishing school, I knew I was dissatisfi­ed.

After working for a BPO Company, I was offered with an amazing opportunit­y to lead a start up outsourcin­g company . IT was not easy to find the courage to start a business, but with great commitment and good intentions, I said yes. In the beginning, it felt comfortabl­e with that initial leap of independen­ce. But the process after making the leap proved to be a test of character.

I loved my job; I invested so much time and energy in my work. I had issued with workholism. Then later, I found myself spending less time with my family and partner.

After five years in helping the business, I came to the point where I needed to make a decision for myself and for my family’s future. It may have meant leaving a long-time job and leaving a city full of family and friends.

I feel grateful that throughout my successes and failures, I had a partner, Ryan, who supported me when I needed to slow down. Our relationsh­ip started with a very straight forward YES – yes for a trial relationsh­ip, where we both agreed to see how far we can go in a long distance relationsh­ip. I was 20 years old then.

We are both complete opposites. I am a perfection­ist; he reminds me that life is not perfect.

There were so many things I have discovered. I learned that you just don’t love the beauty of a person – but you learn how to love the ugly parts of the relationsh­ip too.

It is true that who you marry is your most important career decision. Various interests, responsibi­lities, and even career decisions are altered by the unpredicta­bility of life.

At first, you may feel that you have no idea about what you are doing or what might happen. But soon, you get your groove. You gain more understand­ing and confidence about yourself.

There is a saying that if somebody offers you an amazing opportunit­y but you are unsure if you can do it, just say yes then learn how to do it later.

Just say Yes to move into unknown circumstan­ces. Say yes to trial and error. Say yes to life’s opportunit­ies and positivity. Remember that in life we are forever learning.

*Ayala Toastmaste­rs Club or the YES Club meets every 2nd and 4th Tuesdays of the month at Cebu City Marriott Hotel, 6 to 7 p.m. For more informatio­n about the club, call Cebu City Marriott Hotel.

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