The Freeman

The 7 Characteri­stics of Emotionall­y Strong People

- By Guy Winch Ph.D.

Emotionall­y strong people are able to manage the stresses of daily life more effectivel­y, and recover more quickly from crises. Emotional strength refers to a person’s ‘internal’ coping abilities. The common image of emotionall­y strong people are being the quiet, patient types who never complain and whose emotional expression in the face of problems is limited to jaw-squaring, fistclench­ing, and silent dramatic stares into the horizon.

Any signs of emotional ‘weakness’ (example: expressing emotional distress in any way) or tears (especially in men) are often viewed as evidence that the person has difficulti­es coping and is emotionall­y weak.

But such notions are not only incorrect but tremendous­ly misleading. Emotional strength has little to do with a solid face and even less to do with any momentary reaction. Rather, emotional strength is something that can only be assessed over time. By definition, it involves a person’s ability to deal with challenges and bounce back from difficulti­es, not how they respond in any given moment.

For example, if two kids are playing with their favorite toys and the toys get broken, which of them is emotionall­y stronger – the one who bursts into tears or the one who feels bad just the same but is able to hold back his tears? The answer is neither of the two.

The person’s immediate reaction matters much less than what they do afterwards. One kid may momentaril­y break into tears, feel terrible for a week, but then bounce back and start working, either repairing the broken toy or plan about getting a new one. The other kid may appear to cope better at the moment when the toy breaks, yet feel so defeated that he feels so helpless about losing the toy.

Tears are usually a sign of frustratio­n and disappoint­ment, not defeat. What a person believes about his future chances of success and how discourage­d he feels in the long term is far more important than how his tear ducts respond to stresses and bad news.

Here are seven ways to assess if you are emotionall­y strong:

1. If you are less discourage­d by setbacks and disappoint­ments.

2. If you are more adaptable to change.

3. If you are able to recognize and express their needs.

4. If you focus on getting around a hurdle rather than on the hurdle itself.

5. If you can learn from mistakes and criticism.

6. If you tend to see the larger perspectiv­e in a challengin­g situation.

7. If you are able to recover more quickly from emotional wounds such as failure or rejection.

If you don’t register strongly based on this list, take heart, because you can build emotional strength and resilience by working on your mindset and learning more adaptable responses to the daily distresses of life. little money he has. It may only take studying something first, and then planning the steps to take towards achieving it. Now, if the only thing blocking the way is fear, one shall learn to dare taking the first step.

Most of the time, the worst thing that can happen is for other people to criticize what one does and say he shall not to do it again. But that’s nothing compared to what lies on the other hand – there is always that chance that one’s initiative will be recognized and rewarded. The reward could be a simple nod of approval, but that is enough to make one feel good about himself.

Taking initiative, once it has become a personal trait, will benefit all aspects of one’s life. And it’s a good habit to start at childhood. It can mean an organized home, an orderly schedule, and, in the long run, a tidy life. The person who is in the habit of taking initiative has much control over the kind of life he lives.

The annual Halloween highlight of Parkmall Cebu last opened Friday, October 6. “The Warehouse” dares everyone – young and old alike – to once again experience horror thrill and fun.

Located at the second level West Strip of the mall, the horror park takes after last year’s wellreceiv­ed haunted hospital-themed setup. The horror park has been an annual highlight by Parkmall Cebu since 2010.

“The Warehouse” runs until November 5, and is open from 2 to 10 p.m. daily.

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