Lying vs being discreet
They may look and sound the same but are actually worlds apart. One destroys the truth. The other protects, defends it, and even promotes it.
Lying can sound like the truth since it cites facts and data, but the intention is to deceive. Being discreet may be quiet on some facts and data without denying them. The motive is not to deceive but to help others appreciate a relevant truth.
That’s because human as we are, we get to know and appreciate the truth in stages. We can hardly take the truth in one go and have to know and handle it with discretion.
To distinguish between lying and being discreet requires us to have a proper understanding of what truth is, where and how to find it. It is also a matter of how and when to present it.
It also involves the question of motives. Truthfulness and discretion are not just about facts and data. They have to consider the intentions and the circumstances also.
Truthfulness and discretion will always uphold charity even if in a given moment such efforts involve a lot of sacrifice. Charity dictates the terms of discretion in telling the truth.
The forcefulness of truthfulness and discretion is never one of pride, wanting to dominate and control. It is to uphold the dignity of the person as image and likeness of God. It works for the common good and not just for one’s own interest.
Truthfulness that distinguishes between lying and being discreet requires nothing less than having an intimate relation with God who reveals himself to us fully in Christ, who is made present in the Holy Spirit.
Christ himself told us where to find the truth. “I am the way, the truth and the life,” he said. (Jn 14,6) And even more explicitly, he said to Pilate: “Everyone on the side of the truth listens to me.” (Jn 18,37)
The basis for this is that God, as creator of all things, knows everything. He is the foundation of reality, the measure of truth. Nothing is true, in the proper sense of the word, where God is ignored or mocked. It is God where truth and charity become identical. Truthfulness that distinguishes between lying and being discreet cannot be a matter of our own estimation of things, no matter how well supported we feel our assertions are.
We need to refer things to God and try our best to see and understand things and later talk about them the way God sees, understands and would talk about them.
This can only happen if one has a personal relation with God through Christ in the Holy Spirit. This involves prayer, thorough study of the doctrine of faith, developing the range of virtues, especially humility.
This involves supernatural means like having constant recourse to the sacraments and an active cooperation in the continuing redemptive work of Christ through personal apostolate. That way, we truly get in touch with the people in the most objective way!