Maybe I’m Not A Dog

We went to Kim’s hometown. His family had a little party at the resort nearby. It was a very hot day. I was on a leash but was happily dozing off under the table when I heard someone say, “Kim, your dog looks hot. Why don’t you throw her in the pool? I’m sure she’ll love it.”

I stood up and looked at Kim and begged him with my eyes not to do it. “I am scared of water. I hope you know that.” He picked me up and placed me on his lap and lovingly scratched my head.

“Come here, Mochi, let’s swim together.” Bryan suddenly took me away from Kim and jumped into the pool with me under his arm. I cried and whined. “Help! Help! Kim, help me!” I paddled so hard, but I could not get myself to float. I felt like the harder I paddled, the deeper I went.

I thought I was going to pass out when I felt water get into my ears and nose.

Before I knew it, a pair of hands snatched me away from the water. “Kim! Kim! Oh, thank you for rescuing me!” As soon as I was sure I was on dry land, I licked his face before I tried to lick myself dry. Bryan and Kim had a big fight because of that.

It was a sunny Saturday morning when Kim’s aunt visited us. She handed out some pasalubong to each member of the family. She handed a bag to Kim and said, “Here, give this to Mochi. These bones are really tasty. I got them from the party I attended last night.”

I rolled my eyes when I heard that. “Ewww. Why should I eat bones when Kim feeds me delicious food?”

“No, thank you, Aunt Carol, but Mochi doesn’t eat bones. She has kibbles under the sink and wet food in the refrigerator.” He politely refused. “Thank you, Kim.” I licked his face.

Aunt Carol’s brows raised. “What do you mean? She’s a dog, Kim. All dogs eat bones. You spoil her too much.”

“Actually, bones are not good for dogs. They might choke on them. It is very dangerous. I don’t want to put her in that situation,” Kim explained. “Oh, I love you, Kim.” I barked.

“Do you know how ridiculous that sounds?” She laughed.

“It is true, Aunt Carol. My friend’s dog was brought to the hospital because of bowel obstructions. Undigested bones were found in the dog’s intestines during the surgery,” Kim told her about my friend, Spot who died not too long ago.

“Surgery for a dog? That’s absurd,” There was still disbelief in her voice. She placed the bag of bones on the sink and said “Watch how Mochi will jump for this later. You’ll see how natural it is for her to want these bones.” I did not even take another glance at the bag.

The whole family went to the park. Kim brought my ball and frisbee. We were having so much fun when I felt like pooping. I ran to Kim and gave his right leg a light scratch. It’s how I was trained to signal him for potty.

I was doing my thing when Aunt Carol barged in and saw me sitting on the toilet. I’d just finished pooping so I jumped down and pressed the flush button on the wall. I thought that would impress her, but Kim got an earful from her.

“Kim what have you done to Mochi? Dogs eat bones. Dogs love to swim. Dogs don’t poop in the toilet like that,” she sounded very concerned.

“Maybe I’m not a dog,” I barked at her.