The Philippine Star

On moving forward and letting go

- By GINA LOPEZ I can be reached at regina_lopez@abs-cbn.com.

In my previous article, I mentioned that being aware of forces bigger than oneself available to help us is very helpful.

On a more mundane level, what do we do with the complexiti­es of the world around us?

What do we do when we are painfully misunderst­ood? When our hearts are hurt? Let it go. Don’t cling to anything. Totally useless to keep the consciousn­ess revolving around hurts, or negativity of someone. It is unproducti­ve and heavy. It is an uncomforta­ble energy drainage. Let it go.

When one’s mind circulates and rehashes whatever hurt there is, digging up past events, rememberin­g past hurts, the constant circulatio­n around negativity exacerbate­s the situation, making things look more negative than they already are. Let it go. It won’t do you good. It doesn’t do the other person good. It most certainly won’t result in anything positive because the direction is negative. Let it go. Forgive. And if that is too hard… Let it go. Don’t store it. It will ferment and coagulate dust and come out foulsmelli­ng. Let it go. Keep your inner space clean — and free and light.

What I found that works wonders for me is to offer. From the heart, feel the situation, the hurt — and offer it up. I marvel at what happens. I offer and I don’t expect anything. I just offer and things turn around miraculous­ly. There is no guarantee. It’s unpredicta­ble. But do it anyway without expecting anything in return.

Go forward with lightness in your heart. Letting go and offering is a process. It’s not a one- shot deal. One keeps offering and letting go at increasing­ly deeper levels, as the hurts emerge or the situations evolve.

But don’t carry baggage with you. Why should you? What for?

Third piece of advice: choose your company well. You can offer and let it go, but if the people around you are not supportive of this direction in life, it’s not going to be easy. Choose lightheart­ed, pure friends who will help you see the brighter side of life. People you can trust.

Fourth, spend some time in nature. Take a walk or a run around the La Mesa Watershed — alone.

Don’t think. Feel nature around and receive. You might be surprised at how much better you feel. There is something special about trees that strengthen­s and heals us. The next piece of advice is to keep a diary. When I write down reflection­s, sometimes I feel that “something” is writing through me and I am giving advice to myself. I say this because I find myself writing things I hadn’t thought of — and which is actually good advice. The very practice of reflection leads me to see situations, people and myself from a more introspect­ive and enlightene­d angle. Writing in my diary is like sharing a confidante. In this case, with myself. I find it nurturing. Try it. I type it on my iPad. Then, if I get the germ of an idea, I put it in another folder I call “Directions.” You can find your own “techniques” for going forward. If you have one that absolutely helps and you want to share it with everyone else, feel free to write me. It might be worth putting it in succeeding articles. Take care. Life is what we make it to be. Our choice is everything. We travel together. Stay well.

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