An awesome granny named Mercy
Me r cy Sol ive n David, 81, was a thoughtful mother, a passionate teacher, a faithful friend and a devoted grandmother. She cult ivated an extra special relationship with each of her children, their spouses and grandchildren. She was constantly on the go, doing something good. It was never about her. It was always about others. Having lung cancer did not stop her from spreading more love, cheerfulness and laughter. Her indomitable spirit was beyond sickness.
Her three- day wake turned out to be a celebration of a life so well lived. Her children and grandchildren wept and laughed all at the same time as they recounted Granny Mercy’s awesomeness. I fell in love with her family. Through their stories I felt the gracious heart of their Granny so alive in each one of them.
Her first born, Fr. Louie Soliven David, SJ comforted all her loved ones by celebrating Masses every night in a lovely room, decorated with colorful spring flowers, sharing her life stories woven into his moving homilies. “We lost our father Marno David to congestive heart failure in 1989 leaving our mother to take care of us her eight children,” he said. “She was my counselor and guiding light, a selfless and compassionate woman. I recall this instance when she saw two children on TV stricken with severe psoriasis all over their bodies. Next thing I knew she went to look for them and pleaded with her friends to help. After a year, she was so thankful they were cured. Our mother was considerate and thoughtful to the extreme. Because she didn’t want to burden any of her children, she even planned her own funeral, shouldered all the costs in preparation for this wonderful party, long before her birthday in heaven came to be.”
After the Sunday Mass, Fr. Louie called on all the David grandchildren to deliver their eulogies. I would like to share some beautiful snippets that I picked up from Granny Mercy’s children and grandchildren.
Her only daughter Maritess David Ramos had the privilege of serving her beloved mom as private nurse and dedicated caregiver to the end. This loving gesture was something her mother was so thankful for. Her husband Appie Ramos loved his mother-in-law like a real mother. Their eldest son Miguel, now a doctor, was grateful for the chance to care for his Granny Mercy; so did younger siblings, Iñigo and Cristina.
Miguel, 29: “When I was a baby, my grandmother, together with my mother, patiently cared for me and tucked me into my crib. Because of this (fast forward to many years later), I’m not ashamed to admit that I would often sleep next to my Granny to both watch over her and be comforted by her sheer presence while poring over medical books. And here in bed, between the time of midnight and dawn, is where I would periodically wake up to check on Granny. And I’d usually see her talking on the phone to loved ones in the US, showing that Granny would go out of her way even in the wee hours of the night to check on others to see if they were doing well. Singing and reciting poetry was her passion and the best way she knew how to spread love and cheer. Doing what she loved was the embodiment of what her grandkids now term as YOLO, or ‘you only live once,’ which caused our Granny to live her life with such fervor and fullness.”
Iñigo, 28: “I know how you loved all of your 18 grandchildren equally. I will miss sleeping over with you Grandma, because it meant waking up the next morning to a feast of all I wanted. Thank you for always being so generous. For always placing money inside my wallet, which would magically find its way to your bedside. For spoiling me and calling me your only Boochie Pie. I will always love you, Grandma. You and Mama will always be the loves of my life.” Cristina, 24: “Granny believed that life was better with poetry and music and a big smile on your face. She was one who spread love so generously to everyone she met and would never expect anything in return. To her helpers, drivers, the guards in OB Montessori that she gave attention and gifts to, the LBC fellow named Arthur from New Jersey whom she became friends with through the years…always preparing him a drink and a sandwich for when he comes over…Her love had no boundaries, no limits. She lived life to the fullest with no regrets. As a family, Mercedes Soliven David will continue to live through each one of us. In the way we see life, in the way we act, in the way we make decisions and in the way we love others. So together, we shall dedicate our lives to her beautiful soul.” Her second son Ramon and his wife Mari, just like their four children, Cara, Luisa, Mia and Jaime, were in awe of Granny Mercy because of her selfless spirit.
Cara, 29: “As a child I was so starstruck by her because she was larger than life. She was friends with the Empress of Japan, she mentored Lea Salonga, who I was a fan of, in OB Montessori; and she made the most amazing Mazapan de
Pili for me. Her easy, carefree laughter belied the struggles she went through but all these plus her trust in God and love for family made her life richer. She captivated me. Her joy was so genuine. I’m so confident in how much she loved us.”
Mia, 24: “She was our biggest cheerleader! She was always 100 percent behind us. She not only saw the best in every situation but she always found something to be grateful for. She taught us to be thankful for everything that God gave us. This is something we will all continue to do as we live on with Granny in our hearts.”
Luis, 23: “There are so many things I cherish about Grandma. Her strong fighting spirit, bottomless love for poetry and her kindness that never had an agenda. Her love extended far beyond her family, whom she already loved so much. Her childlike happiness and love is something that I will always remember along with her melodious laugh that made me feel that I had given her so much joy. We will all carry a piece of her heart with us now.”
Jaime, 18: “My fondest memory of Granny happened on a midnight visit in New Jersey. As I said good night to her she whispered ‘I love you. You’re my favorite ha!’ I felt so loved, so good. The next night I heard her whisper the same to my sister. It just goes to show we were all her favorites and we all felt that way. May we continue her legacy of spreading love and spreading joy to everyone because that’s what Granny wanted. For her fourth son Eddie and his gentle wife Margie, it was an honor to provide a cozy room for Granny Mercy in their New Jersey residence because her presence blessed and brightened up their world. During her visits she would spontaneously break out in poetry and song, start dancing and her girlish laughter filled their home. She enjoyed packing boxes full of gifts she bought not for herself but for others. When Sammy, her fifth son, was working in the Bataan refugee camp in the ‘80s where he met his future wife Nina, his mother took a three-hour bus ride all by herself to visit them. When they were newly married and too busy at work to fix their abode, Nina recalls how her lovable mother-in-law surprised them — they arrived home to find their rooms beautifully spic and span. Sammy and Nina are blessed with three children Carmela, Francis and Enzo who adore their Granny.
Carmela, 25: “Grandma lived life to the fullest. She didn’t wait until tomorrow to give you advice about life, love, friends and school. She didn’t wait until next time to tell you she loved you or give you hugs and kisses. Or if she caught you looking intently at something she had, she was quick to say, ‘Oh, iha, that’s yours na.’ I would like to quote what she randomly told me one day out of the blue, ‘A person is beautiful when she is happy and likes making others happy.’ And that is exactly how she lived.”
Francis, 23: “Something I have always loved about Grandma is she was always all about happiness. She was always sweet and kind and always went out of her way to make people happy. I remember accompanying her on a trip to visit her friend and ‘poem pal,’ the Empress of Japan. Whenever we would leave the house, she would sneak money into my pocket when she thought I wasn’t looking and when I’d catch her, she’d say, ‘I want you to buy something really nice for yourself.’ When I’d ask her why, she would just smile and say, ‘You look so handsome when you’re happy.’ She was a master storyteller who shared her life in animated detail. She always welcomed all into her life and gave them so much reason to stay.”
Enzo, 15: There are many things I love about Granny. She was very optimistic. She always smiled even when facing things others would just fall down and surrender to. She always kept a light spirit always jolly. She would never be the one to darken any conversation and she would always be the one to lighten it. She was a supportive grandmother who would never get angry if you made a bad decision. She would tell you that it’s okay to make mistakes and tell you to get back on your feet. Lastly, Granny had unbreakable faith. I think this is what carried her all her life. She never had a doubt that God would be there to back her up.” Her seventh son Cesar was her book shopping partner. He enjoyed accompanying his mother to her favorite shop, the Goodwill Stores in New Jersey where she enjoyed buying all kinds of books and things. She donated many books she bought to the Benito Soliven Academy in Ilocos, a school named after her late father, the brilliant assemblyman Benito T. Soliven. Dan the youngest son was intoxicated by his mother’s love since birth. Today, his wife Rona and their two children Sabina and Pio are high on mega doses of Granny Mercy’s love. Rona shared, “She made me want to be a better person because of the way she loved us.” She fondly recalled the day she came home from work to find some delicious empanadas personally delivered by Granny Mercy. So she thanked her profusely and the next day two boxes arrived simply because she was so happy Rona liked them. Her thoughtfulness was unparalleled. She knew that Rona would often rush out to work without breakfast and was happy to provide her baon.
Sabina, 14: “Grandma is the highlight of everyone’s day. Whenever she visited us at home, I always felt very special because she was like a celebrity taking time out to visit her No. 1 fan, me. I will never forget all the times she would gift me with poems, handwritten so nicely and well spaced on a board, and make me practice them in front of her. She would make me say a line again and again, and I would. I like to think that we were best friends. She would visit us and bring us Jollibee spaghetti and burgers that made us fat. There has never been a bad atmosphere around her because when I think of my grandma, I always think of happiness. I will always love you, Grandma!”
Pio, 11: “When I was younger my awesome Grandma was like an unfinished puzzle to me, because she always put a lot of feelings and emotions when she talked. When I was in Grade 5, I had to prepare for an elocution quiz in order to join a contest. I was so stressed one week before the test. Grandma helped me overcome my fear of talking to a big crowd. She taught me to deliver every word with emotion and confidence. Because of her, I made it. I am thankful for Grandma’s devotion to me. I will never forget what she did to make a difference in my life.”