The Philippine Star

UNCOVERING THE ADDICTING APPEAL OF REALITY DATING SHOWS

- By PATRICIA MANARANG

If you’ve been camping out on Netflix, you’ve probably seen the second season of Single’s Inferno dominating the front page. You also probably know a couple of people who are invested in the show and have been talking about it online.

I personally watched it continuous­ly for four days straight when all the episodes came out, and together with my mom, I shouted and reacted intensely to every scene and plot point. It didn’t help that the show’s structure included a panel that would also react to everything going on, and I found myself mirroring or disagreein­g with their opinions.

As I was watching, I found my emotions extremely funny. Why was I so invested in this? What made my feelings flare so strongly at the antics of these people looking for love? I don’t tend to binge new shows, opting more to return to my comfort series and just rewatch them over and over. But there’s something about dating reality shows that have me, and many others, by the throat.

Reality dating shows have always been a fixture in popular media. There are iconic and long-standing ones such as The Bacheloret­te and The Bachelor that are still running, and many niche series popping up like Love is Blind and The Ultimatum. The latter types usually put their participan­ts through extraordin­ary conditions that test their ability to form connection­s.

Despite differing in premise, all of these shows put human relationsh­ips at the forefront. Even if reality TV has some aspects to them that are manufactur­ed — maybe they’re prompted to start specific conversati­ons by producers or they go into predetermi­ned situations — a lot of the emotions shown are raw. We see people for who they are and how they navigate interactin­g with others. In a world where we sometimes have difficulti­es communicat­ing our feelings, it’s kind of refreshing to watch people put out all their thoughts out in the open. They might say it to their romantic interests or in their confession­als, but when contestant­s are so open about their intentions and their motivation­s, it’s a welcome change from the guessing game that is real-life romance.

These dating shows are also ways for us to reevaluate our own dating preference­s and habits. Does this one contestant give you the ick? Maybe there’s something about their behavior that you yourself find a turnoff in a partner. Does their age, background or job affect how you view them, or do these things not matter to you at all? Love and attraction are usually influenced by outside factors, and it’s fascinatin­g to see these make or break the relationsh­ip. Personally, I enjoyed getting to find out the ages and jobs of the contestant­s on Single’s Inferno, because I wanted to see if their personalit­ies matched their lives outside of the show. These were also evidently important to the participan­ts as well, as you can tell that their interests either peaked or decreased after getting to know each other more.

Since these shows usually feature people with personalit­ies ranging from shy and withdrawn to forward and confident, it’s also captivatin­g to see how they react to the things that happen to them. Are they the type to make the first move or wait to get approached? Some people also have more relaxed views on love and dating while others are more serious, and these shows reveal how people find common ground in terms of their life principles. A lot of times when I watch reality shows I find myself going, “Oh wow, so there really are people like that out there,” and being fascinated at how they deal with romance-related challenges. In a way, these shows expose us to all kinds of people, maybe even ones we wouldn’t get to interact with on a daily basis.

AWhen contestant­s are so open about their intentions, it’s a welcome change from the guessing game that is real-life romance.

nother draw-in of reality dating shows is that we can see all the messy and complicate­d effects of love without experienci­ng the hurt firsthand. The ups and downs involved are something necessary in all relationsh­ips, and there are a number of things that can go wrong in them that we might not even get to face with our own partners. These shows feel like safer ways to explore our emotions and learn how we could handle different challenges in our relationsh­ips.

The biggest and most basic appeal of these shows is the high drama and entertainm­ent factor they bring. They’re just plain fun, and it’s too easy to have favorite contestant­s and even ones you hate. Gushing and squealing over kilig moments and hiding behind your hands during cringy ones are enjoyable, just like watching any other series or movie. Reality shows are also extremely good at hooking their audience and reeling them in with their cast of huge personalit­ies and premises.

All in all, reality dating shows are entertaini­ng pieces of media that can help us analyze our own relationsh­ips. If you’ve been hesitating to get into them, here’s your sign from the universe. Maybe you’ll learn something new about yourself, or you’ll just find something very addicting to watch.

My experience of Filipino culture is ingrained in my earliest memories: being forced to siesta every afternoon by my Lola, eating extra-sour sinigang for both lunch and dinner, and playing Filipino street games like tumbang preso and patintero with my neighbors.

I realize most of these happened within the walls of my own country. But Filipinos are not just based in the Philippine­s — with Filipinos living in different parts of the world due to globalizat­ion, one might wonder: How do Filipinos, especially those who were raised elsewhere, experience culture outside of their home country?

In recent years, researcher­s have looked into this phenomenon and coined the term “third-culture kids” to describe children who spent most of their developmen­tal years in rounded by Filipinos both at home and in school, with the rare exception of interactin­g with people of different cultures in public places. So being Filipino came naturally — it just so happened that she was experienci­ng it from another country.

But not everyone shares Hipol’s experience. In fact, other third-culture kids were more exposed to people from different cultures of respecting others, particular­ly elders, which is very similar to Thai values. As he was growing up, he felt no particular affinity to just one culture because of his exposure to many of them.

Though they have varying experience­s, Hipol and Rivera both had to adapt to the adjust to Thai culture, but to all the cultures he was exposed to at his internatio­nal school in Bangkok.

“American culture was a bit easier (to adjust to) since I grew up speaking English, but Thai culture was more difficult as they have a certain way of treating others with respect and humility. American culture is a very mindyour-own-business culture. (The two) clash at times, but with the mindset of everyone in internatio­nal schools, you learn how to respect others’ cultures as well,” he explained.

The experience of being a third-culture kid is multifacet­ed. While Hipol shares that her main cultural identity remained Filipino even with her geographic location, Rivera finds that he is an amalgamati­on of all the cultures he’s been exposed to, whether that’s Filipino, Thai, American, or Chinese. “The way my brother and I see it, we have multicultu­ral values. (It translated) even into our accent: it’s not an American accent or a Filipino accent. I didn’t notice that at first,

 ?? Art by CID GONZALES ??
Art by CID GONZALES
 ?? ?? Dominique Hipol as a Grade 2 student in the Al-Dura Gems Internatio­nal School, Jeddah
Dominique Hipol as a Grade 2 student in the Al-Dura Gems Internatio­nal School, Jeddah
 ?? ?? 13-year-old Hipol wearing an abaya, which used to be mandatory in Saudia Arabia
13-year-old Hipol wearing an abaya, which used to be mandatory in Saudia Arabia

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