9 ways to support an introverted child

Accept it is not about you. Do not take a child’s quiet nature personally or as an indication he or she is ignoring you.

Introduce your child to new people and situations slowly.

Teach introverted children they can take breaks from social situations if they feel overwhelmed or tired.

Help your child find the strengths that come from being introverted.

Do not label introverts as shy, and encourage them to correct this label when others use it.

Talk to your child’s teacher. The partnerships I have with my daughter’s teachers have made all the difference to her. Her early experiences in school have been positive because of the respect and understanding her teachers show her. Also, if the teacher knows about your child’s introversion, she may be able to gently help the child navigate things such as interactions with friends, participation in group work or presenting in class.

Help them be heard. Introverts “live internally, and they need someone to draw them out”, writes Marti Olsen Laney in her book The Hidden Gifts of the Introverted Child. “Without a parent who listens and reflects back to them, like an echo, what they are thinking, they can get lost in their own minds,” Laney adds.

Embrace the idea they may only have a few friends at a time. Parents who are very social and have a lot of friends often struggle when their children don’t socialise in the same way. Often, introverted children enjoy their world the most with just a few close friends.

Understand they may not ask for help.

I think the most important thing I have learned is to embrace the quiet. Enjoy it with your child and recognise a lot can be said without any noise. We can learn a lot from the hidden gifts and quiet nature of our introverted children.