City’s solutions to problems become bigger problems

SUCCESSIVE Cape Town city councils have handed down strange traditions that have become an accepted part of the city’s character. One of these has been the fervent removal of alien trees to be replaced by palm trees, which are no less alien than pines or eucalyptus trees, but seem to have gained “honorary indigenous” status over the years.

We have palm trees everywhere. They provide hardly any shade, no fruit and maximum mess but they’re ours and we stick them in wherever there’s a spare spot. Another Cape mania is the installation of speed bumps on roads in residential areas.

We just need one worried mom to claim that motorists are “roaring through our suburb at dangerous speeds”, and out come the speed bump teams to install humps at regular intervals.

I think we must have the distinction of having more speed bumps per capita than any other city in the world.

I was interested to read a report in The Telegraph this week that said Britain might be removing speed bumps from roads across the country as part of the plan to reduce pollution. Studies have apparently shown that driving over speed bumps produces 98% more pollution than driving at a steady speed on a flat road.

So we reduce the danger from being hit by a speeding car by a tiny amount and double the danger of getting lung diseases from toxic emission gases.

Sounds like a poor bargain to me. I was interested in another point made in the same British government report. Some time ago motorists were urged to switch to diesel vehicles to cut down on pollution.

Diesel owners were granted a reduction on their licence fees. It was subsequently discovered that diesel vehicles produce four times as much nitrogen dioxide and 22 times more particulates than petrol cars. Officials are considering a major policy reversal.

I wonder how those drivers will feel about having switched from petrol to diesel in the interests of saving the planet from pollution, only to discover they’ve been stinking up the world worse than before. In a way it’s like Cape Town’s obsession with traffic lights. They bloom like weeds at every traffic intersection, often where traffic circles would be far more effective.

Thousands of cars are stopped at any moment in our city, waiting for lights to change when there are no other vehicles within whole city blocks, but obeying red light bulbs and belching out polluting gases, just like the drivers slowing down, changing gears speeding up again and pouring out toxic gases at speed bumps.

It seems that all too often we think we have solutions to problems, only to discover those solutions are in fact problems bigger than those we started with. Life is a series of problems.

Last Laugh

A tramp knocked at the door of the George and Dragon Inn and a grim faced woman opened it. “What do you want?” she demanded.

“I am hungry, madam,” he said. “I need some food.” “Go away,” she yelled and slammed the door. A few moments later the tramp knocked again. “Yes?” yelled the woman. “What do you want now?”

“May I speak to George please?”