Ode to inspirational Edgar

‘HAVE you seen see Edgar?” I was asked this question by many homeless people in and around The Company’s Garden. Edgar… It is far too complex to even think I will be able to explain to you the phenomenal human being he was. Yes, was. He died. And when I got the word, I carried on with life as it is. People have died so many times it’s like calling wolf.

My ex “died” about four times – currently, in Pollsmoor (a story for another day). Even I left this planet twice. You walk down the streets and people would say “Oh my God! You not dead?” I never had the guts to ask them if it is a good or a bad thing.

I got confirmation that Edgar was indeed dead. It feels so weird thinking about him not being here with us.

There was nothing subtle about the man. He loved life, people and squirrels. He sold nuts in the Gardens and he used to sing ‘Would you like to buy some nuts for the squirrels, squirrels?” Now there is just silence.

I feel cheated by Edgar. To just go like that, unannounced. Like I missed his last and final dramatic departure. No front row seat to be part of his production. And no refund.

But worst of all, I never had the time to tell him what he really meant to me. The deep admiration for him being so brave. To beat cancer and at the same time be out there for the homeless in need. How much he inspired me, How much he meant to me. And that I loved him.

Together we were like a weapon of mass destruction. Every challenge we tackled together made people nervous because we believed in what we stood for. And this made people try to break us apart.

When I started to work, he told me “Go. Go and never come back.” The times I did come to visit he was distant and cold. His way of making it uncomfortable for me on the street.

Edgar was on his way to a Winter Readiness Camp near Strandfontein. His first step in leaving the life on the street. But I guess heaven is a much better option.

There are many of us out there who are living compromised moments. Some homeless people died from the cold last winter. What a waste of a human life.

The one thing I will always have in my soul is how little worth we have in this city as homeless people.

How easy it is to erect a fence around a park to keep us out.

To remove taps so we have no water. No public toilets so that a woman who is old enough to be your granny must do it in public.

How they prevent us from doing recycling so we can earn a bit of money but then at the same time blame some of us for begging on the streets.