The danger when demographics steers economy

AFRIEND from Joburg wanted to surprise his wife by giving her a car for her birthday. (An almost new one, because we normal people seldom stretch our finances to pay for new cars.) car, for most of us, is the biggest purchase we ever make, other than a house, so buying one is something rather important. My friend looked through the show windows of several dealers before arriving at his choice of birthday gift. He went into the showroom, where several so-called sales people were lounging, prodding their cellphones idly.

He stood next to the car he liked, coughed discreetly (no response) then opened the driver’s door and looked inside (no reaction) and finally sat in the car and twiddled the steering wheel. The staff continued to prod their devices.

Eventually my friend became irritated and slammed the car door and headed for the exit. A man in a suit came out of an office and asked if he could help.

“I don’t think so,” said my friend sarcastically. “I was considering buying a car, but it seems they are not for sale.”

The suited man called to a “sales lady” and told her to attend to the customer. She sighed, got up and oozed across the showroom floor, but just before she reached my friend her phone rang, so she turned around and, with her back to him, answered it.

He left the dealer’s showroom, realising nobody was in the slightest bit interested in selling him a used skateboard, let alone a car. He eventually bought his wife’s birthday present elsewhere.

Out of courtesy, however, he called the first company later and spoke to the managing director, telling him of the abysmal service he had encountered. The MD seemed genuinely sorry, but explained that, in terms of his lease, he was committed to employing staff according to the local “demographics”.

This meant his staff had to consist of set percentages of black, coloured, Indian and white employees. Once those percentages had been met, the staff were aware they were there as a vital part of the company’s lease agreement and if they were fired, the “demographics” would be upset. So they prodded their phones all day unhampered.

I found it hard to believe this story should have happened. It seems incredible that after so many horrible racist years during our shameful apartheid days, we should be back in a situation where your job depends on the colour of your skin.

Didn’t we get past that?

Last Laugh

A man was strolling along a deserted stretch of beach when he saw a shiny bottle come washing up out of the surf. He picked it up and pulled out the ancient cork.

Out popped a genie who yelled with joy and said: “I’ve been imprisoned in that bottle for 100 years. You have released me. In gratitude, I will grant you any wish you like.”

The man thought for a minute and then said: “I would like you to make me irresistible to women.”

The genie waved a hand and there was a shower of glittering stars. And the man turned into a box of chocolates.