Finding peace in war zone
Like gentle dew from heaven, pupils make a difference in their violence-ridden community
MY NAME is Talia. It means gentle dew from heaven. It is a Hebrew name that was first used in an area around the Mediterranean. I do not know other girls with that name. I like the meaning of the name… dew from heaven.
How I wish we could have a moment of heaven here in Hanover Park. But it is as if we are living in hell in Hanover Park, because of the violence in this community. I have an innocent seven-year old cousin who was killed, an aunt who survived a gunshot, and friends who were injured because of ongoing violence.
In Hanover Park we do not have most of the human rights promised to us in South Africa’s constitution. The poison of violence robs us of our rights.
At 16 years old, it is safe to say that I am no different from young girls anywhere in the world. As very young women we have dreams and ideas about ourselves and the world; travelling and exploring and meeting new people and doing exciting things… to have harmony and live without fear.
My grandmother took care of me since I was a baby. My parents parted ways when I was still in nappies. Sadly, I think this reality is also true for millions of children who do not have their parents to raise them. Anyway, my grandmother taught me to have real values and be a loving and caring person.
She somehow found the time to explain things to me. She created a structure and a peaceful space for me in her home. I do not know how this amazing woman did it in a war zone.
My granny passed away when I was only 13, and writing my final Grade 7 exams. My inner peace was shattered and my heart was broken. What did I as a 13 year old know about this cruel world? And my teenage years had just begun.
It was hard for me to accept that the person who was the centre of my life was no longer there. For more than a year, I found myself in situations where I was fighting with people, because there was no peace in my soul. I felt as if I went into depression, always angry…
In fact people would say that I am anti-social, because they never understood what I was really going through.
I also was not ready to speak about the pain in my heart.
After my granny’s passing, I lived with my mother who lived with eight other family members in the house. There was no order, nor was there peace: everyone would constantly scream at one another.
My uncle was on drugs and he would invite his addict friends and they would sit and smoke in the house.
I lived in fear, constantly wondering what is going through their minds because every moment around them felt uncomfortable. My anxiety grew, because everyday you hear that somebody has been raped or murdered and that was the uncomfortable thoughts I had.
I made it out of those bad situations and I realised that children commit suicide when they go through things like I have. In that house, I did not have peace and in the community there was never ending violence. Innocent young kids are constantly losing their lives. It is so easy to be influenced to take drugs and alcohol, because you can buy it anywhere.
I constantly feel unsafe, afraid to go places or even just to walk to the shop, not knowing if I will make it home safely.
I was still living in this bad situation when Professor Brian Williams introduced me to the Peace Ambassadors programme supported by Mr Hein Bowers, our principal. When Prof Williams started speaking, “Peace starts with you” and the different colours of peace, it hit me so hard. It was if he was speaking directly to me, because I needed inner peace.
His words were life-changing, and I discovered my purpose. I had thought so little about myself and I saw myself as a failure living in bad circumstances, but now new energy drove me to get involved with the Peace Ambassadors. And I found a measure of inner peace.
Me and four schoolmates: Keanan Weitz, Rasheeda Smith, Shehaam Davids and Britney van Bridges had a peace programme for children from the community. We shared peace messages, did fun activities and provided food and gifts for them. It was overwhelming to see how much these kids appreciated everything.
Athlone News was there and it felt good to do good things.
My English teacher Ms Boltman inspires me. She is gentle and sings and writes music. I love singing and would like to become a teacher or a social worker. We have choices… and I have new desires to become a mirror of love and peace through the peace ambassadors.