Who is Eskom of loathsome load shedding?

LOATHSOME load shedding debacles continue to make uneducated, unsophisticated citizenry and peasants (read “me” at top of that list) repeatedly ask the same unanswered question: “Who exactly is Eskom? Where does he live? How was he born? Is he a local fellow or from the north? Who pays his money at the end of the month? (don’t answer that!)”

Did he create electricity like that American (has to be American, right?) – Benjamin Franklin, just after he sulked off into the mountains just because he asked for more allowance and his father shouted “Go fly a kite!” Or was this Eskom creature created from a bolt of lightning over the Majuba Mountains, like that local, friendly, Frankenstein monster? “Parastatal?” Is that word derived from the Indian term patented by Chatsworth and some parts of Clare Estate – “Pareh”, meaning a really bad argument and maybe some blood-letting, not related to cupping, but closer to klupping?

What really came first? Adam or Eve? I always felt it was “Ladies first”. Reverting (some religions love using this term!) to that organic creature, the question (only when the lights go off, but otherwise always forgotten) remains:

“Does the dog wag its vertebrate endings – also commonly known as the tail – or does the tail – a la the DC Superhero who quite often hurls monstrous, menacing giant alien planets back where they came from – wag this entire government, country, production, economy, education, traffic lights, supermarkets, DStv, and the very few worthwhile watching SABC soapies with total, zero intolerance and with 150 impunity?

EBRAHIM ESSA | Durban