A Haven for abuse survivors
GLADYS MODISE is only 22 years old but has gone through a lot in her young life.
She was orphaned at 16, kicked out of her family home, forced to move in with her boyfriend who then physically abused her, forced to move out of his home when she could not take his beatings any more, ended up on the streets, and went back to him when she found out she was pregnant. But the abuse continued despite the fact that she was carrying his child.
Thanks to the police who took her to Ikhaya Lethemba, a centre that caters for abused women, Modise has now put the abuse behind her and is thriving.
Not only did she complete her matric, obtaining five As and two Bs while pregnant, but Modise is studying towards her bachelor degree in education at the University of Johannesburg.
“I want to become the best educator I can be and provide a better life for my son,” she said.
Modise said everything started going wrong after she lost her parents in 2011. Her father’s family then started fighting for ownership of the house. She said they claimed she was not related to them, kicked her out and said she must go and search for her biological father. This was despite her only being 16 and in Grade 10.
She moved in with her boyfriend as she had nowhere to go. However, instead of her boyfriend giving her love and warmth, she said she was beaten every day.
“I would have to go to school with bruises on my face and I would lie and say I got into fights with other girls,” said Modise.
She said she tried numerous times to get out of the relationship, seeking help from her mother’s side of the family, but received none.
She moved out and would squat at a friend’s house or sleep under bridges while attending school.
When Modise found she was pregnant, she said she had no choice but to go back to her abusive boyfriend for shelter. But the beating got so bad at one point that her cries attracted neighbours who rescued her and took her to the police station to lay charges against her boyfriend.
A police officer then took her to Ikhaya Lethemba centre where she got counselling.
“When I met one of the house mothers who deals with spiritual counselling, I started having hope again,” she said.
While at the centre Modise passed her matric with flying colours. The centre also helped her apply to UJ where she was accepted.
While Modise’s boyfriend was never prosecuted for abusing her, he stays with their 3-year-old son while Modise stays in a UJ student residence.
Merita Ground, director of Ikhaya Lethemba, said Modise was one of the youngest women there at the time.
“What is admirable is that through it all, she stayed true to her worth and ideals,” said Ground. She said Modise’s story inspired many young girls, professional women and single mothers who suffered abuse.
Gauteng Community Safety MEC Sizakele Nkosi-Malobane said she opened the one-stop centre while she was still a councillor in 2000, long before she became an MEC. She said that a friend was raped and physically abused by her husband and when she tried to assist her, they were sent from pillar to post.
“I decided to partner with national, provincial and civil society to build a home like Ikhaya Lethemba that would assist women who face genderbased violence,” said NkosiMalobane.
“We didn’t know we would become the first onestop centre in the country able to cater for women the way we do, under one roof.” Ikhaya Lethemba is a holistic psychosocial service centre that continues to play a key role in supporting victims of genderbased violence. Today the shelter accommodates 140 women and children for sixs to nine months.