Pestering patriarchy

LAST week, I drove a teenage girl back to a township adjacent to Kuils River. The poverty of people in the streets was evident. There were few women around and I wondered why.

There were a number of teenage boys and lone men in sight. Two 14-yearold boys sauntered up to us as they puffed on their cigarettes.

I had said my goodbyes to her, and must admit felt safer sitting in my car, though with my window wide open.

The girl subsequently told me that one of these two 14-year-old boys had been in school with her, but had dropped out and his personality had completely altered. The one, with a wide smile, reached out to shake my hand, which I did and then complimented me on how good looking I was, but in such a way which made me feel uneasy.

I made light of it, saying smiling makes everyone look good. But he didn’t leave it at that. He demanded I give him milk tart from my young friend who was holding one. I started the car.

“You must come back,” he said. With a chuckle, he added: “My friend wants to do this to you,” and demonstrated a sexual gesture with his groin.

I drove away feeling such sadness at the likely plight of women there and in much of South Africa at large. The patriarchy of the system, the domination of frustrated men over women. I felt so sick and angry at not being able to help the situation.

There are so many local initiatives confronting and trying to change society through education. It is they who deserve accolades and all our support.

Cry the beloved country.