10 years ago

SCHOOLS in the Northern Cape are generally safe. This is the assurance given by Education Ministry spokesperson, Douglas Mthukwane, in response to a recent incident of school violence in Krugersdorp where a pupil was allegedly stabbed by a fellow pupil. Mthukwane said the feeling from his department was that the schools in the Province were generally safe.

IHAVE a favour to ask. When someone opens a door for you, or gives up a chair so you can sit down, or offers to help you carry heavy parcels, or compliments you on your appearance, or does just about anything that resembles an act of common courtesy, please, don’t judge him. Say thank you.

This may be a lot to ask, in a world where ALL men are the same, but you never know. Maybe, just maybe, this type of courtesy isn’t criminal but considerate.

I know this may sound farfetched but believe it or not, some of us were actually raised with good manners and some of us don’t have a hidden agenda.

We all know that gender inequality is a reality and anyone who is not concerned about the prevalence of domestic violence is either blind to a major problem in our society or simply part thereof.

When it comes to sexually-based offences, men are usually the perpetrators and women their victims.

Deadbeat dads are a dime a dozen as men have the biological advantage of being able to do the crime before ignoring the time, an avenue far more treacherous to follow for the mothers of unwanted children.

Men lie, steal, cheat, manipulate, objectify, exploit and abuse.

For generations we have been told we are superior and over time, we misconstrued the facts and started believing that it was fair to view the fairer sex as inferior.

These convictions just seemed logical. Men are faster, bigger and stronger, perfect traits for domination. Men don’t need facts or faith to finish on top. We have religious indoctrination and force to do that for us.

Men don’t even need to be particularly smart to stay on top. We have physicality to mask our failings and are able to draw disproportionate levels of self-worth from the little things in life, like standing up to pee.

I completely understand why many women see ALL men as the enemy. It’s just so easy.

However, we are referring to an “enemy” that is not overly complicated and actually requires little more attention and maintenance than a pot plant.

Men really are simple creatures. The type of beings that can draw a tremendous amount of satisfaction from their ability to pick up their undies between their toes as they get out of the shower, before flicking them up and catching them. They say that small things amuse small minds so to view these geniuses as your nemesis is more of an indictment on you than on men.

Women are far smarter than men generally give them credit for, making it easy to understand why you question the agenda of someone who opens a door for you, or gives up a chair so you can sit down, or offers to help you carry something, or compliments you on your appearance, or basically does anything that should be viewed as common courtesy. However, ALL men are NOT the same. Hiding an agenda is far more difficult than plucking your undies out of the air, so when we perform an act of chivalry, as would make our mothers proud, it might be just that.

Maybe I’m not letting you go on ahead of me so I can look at your bum or so that whatever dangerous beast lurking behind closed doors eats you before me.

Maybe I’m not offering to carry your bags because I think women are weak, incompetent or incapable.

Maybe I’m not complimenting you on your appearance because I think you are gullible enough to sleep with me. Maybe I’m doing it because I also like being told that I look nice, every once in a while.

Maybe, just maybe, my male manners aren’t an attempt to manipulate or misuse. Maybe they are just my way of saying I respect you and am tremendously grateful for everything my fellow human beings have done for me.

Maybe you should say, thank you.