Wax hysterical

‘I couldn’t wear underwear or even pants for weeks!’

A while back I was dating a new guy and things were getting quite hot and heavy. I decided that I’d surprise him by getting a Hollywood wax – the one where they wax absolutely everything off.

It was my first time getting waxed so I wasn’t sure what to expect and, of course, I was very nervous. I got on the table and spread my legs.

The therapist applied the hot

wax, placed a strip over it andletrip.It was the worst pain I’ve ever felt. I knew it would be sore, but my reaction was on par with that scene in The 40-Year-Old

Virgin where Steve Carell gets his back waxed. I assumed it was just because I had never had a wax before, so I gritted my teeth and stuck it out.

She eventually gets to the most sensitive area: I end up with hot wax on my labia, she pulls, and I can feel it rip – hair, skin, the works. The pain was blinding, and the blood didn’t help calm my panic. The whole thing was meant to take 45 minutes, but I was on that table for over an hour.

On top of everything, I had also asked her to wax my eyebrows. Which was fine, until she dripped a massive dollop of hot wax in my eye! They had to use loads of baby oil and cut off some of my eyelashes to get all the wax off. I thought I was going togo blind in that eye.

At this point I was completely traumatised – and I hadn’t yet had a chance to look down at her handiwork. When I finally mustered the courage, I was horrified. All I could see were HOLES! I don’t know if the wax was too hot or if I’d had an allergic reaction or something, but all my hair follicles were gaping holes. I looked like a plucked chicken.

Afterwards I couldn’t wear underwear or even pants for three weeks; I had to wear skirts and go commando! The therapist said it was all completely normal, but surely it can’t be?