EXPROPRIATE THAT KITCHEN

With the DA embroiled in such nasty power squabbles, is it enough to leave opposition to ANC hegemony to the Red Overalls?

Poor naive me, I thought that with the departure of Auntie Patricia from the DA, tensions in the party would simmer down and there would be stability at last.

But it seems the power struggle has only just begun. If those clever people called political analysts are to be believed, Godzille’s threat of a tax revolt is only a smokescreen. According to these smart people the call is calculated to deepen discord in the party which, in turn, would turn away potential new members. This, in the end, is to ensure that the party performs atrociously in the coming elections.

The pitiful result will therefore be used as a justification for a putsch against leader Mymoney, who will be accused of having run the party into the ground. Cutting off your nose to spite your face, basically. Or chopping off your head to spite your body.

Can things be that bad in the DA? Not that it affects me directly, though it is always nice to have the DA snapping at the heels of the ANC, keeping it in check. But if the opposition is embroiled in such nasty power squabbles it has no hope in hell of challenging ANC hegemony.

Is it enough to leave the opposition role to the Red Overalls? While the DA has governed such important cities as Cape Town and Tshwane, giving SA a semblance of good governance, that cannot be said for the Red Overalls. They are, at best, good entertainers. They have turned the hitherto dour parliamentary sessions into something worth looking forward to.

Speaking of which, all eyes will be on Cape Town this week as President Thuma Mina delivers his state of the nation (Sona) address. But as we all know, the interesting parts of Sona are not the address but the fashion parade beforehand and the sumptuous party that follows.

“From the budgeted R4.7m in 2018, the actual expenditure came down to R1.9m,” National Assembly speaker Baleka Mbete said. “For this address, we have budgeted R2.5m, and we are confident that … the actual expenditure will be significantly lower.” On hearing the news that the budget for the party had been cut, I thought I heard a loud grumbling of parliamentary stomachs.

It was in the spirit of austerity that I decided to dine at the unassuming The Schwarma Co in Norwood, a vibrant eatery with lots of happy people munching away at Middle Eastern cuisine. The menu is quite open-minded in that it also offers lots of Western food such as steak with veggies.

But I wanted to be simple and down to earth. No springbok carpaccio for me. No oysters. No wines with unpronounceable names. A good old lamb shank with mashed potatoes was what I settled for, chasing it down with an Amstel. The lamb shank was tender and mouth-watering. It would have been divine had the chef not drowned the meat in a very tomatoey sauce. I mean, come on! Leave the shank alone; let it perform its own magic.

In a desperate attempt to restore the dignity of the poor lamb shank, I had to shovel the accursed sauce to the side of my plate. It spoilt what would have been a beautiful meal. An anticlimax, to put it crudely. The chef needs to reconsider that sauce — otherwise I am going to ask the Red Overalls to deal with him. Comrade Julius, get the boys ready; let’s go and expropriate that kitchen.

The chef needs to reconsider that sauce — or else I’m going to ask Comrade Julius and the Red Overalls to deal with him

The Schwarma Co

★★★

71 Grant Avenue, Norwood, Joburg Tel: 011-483-1776

★★★★★ Baleka Mbete

★★★★ Mmusi Maimane

★★★ Nomvula Mokonyane

★★ Iqbal Survé

★ Gavin Watson