Money Do you ‘SUI’? (That’s ‘Shop Un­der The In uence’.)

That’s ‘Shop Un­der The In­flu­ence’. Al­co­hol + on­line shop­ping = bad idea. The plus side? Those Mer­lot-fu­elled or­ders can be funny!

Glamour (South Africa) - - Front Page -

“I got drunk and watched the Drew Bar­ry­more film Whip It, de­cided I needed to join a roller derby team and pro­ceeded to buy the en­tire set of skat­ing gear, set­ting me back R4 300. I’d al­ready can­celled my ap­pli­ca­tion to the derby (although my roller derby name of Cam-i-kaze would have been ace), when knee pads and mouth guards started ar­riv­ing. I had to sell it all back on­line. The worst thing is, I can’t even Rollerblade!” – Camilla, 29

“I went through a phase of buy­ing eye-wa­ter­ingly ex­pen­sive crys­tal de­canters on­line – like some kind of lord. I had an ac­tual col­lec­tion in the end.” – Katie, 33

“When my neigh­bour SMSED me say­ing he had ‘my bike’ and ask­ing when I wanted to col­lect it, I was puz­zled. Then the 2am plans to train for a triathlon came back.” – Vic­to­ria, 30

“I bought a ‘cool’ leather choker. Which turned out to be a dog col­lar.”

“In a vodka-trig­gered ‘I’m an em­pow­ered woman, I don’t need a man, I’m go­ing to send my­self flow­ers’ mo­ment, I hit up In­ter­flora. Yep, talk about cringe. When they ar­rived at my apart­ment, I threw the bou­quet away.” – Emily, 28 – Co­lette, 23

“I bought my other half an ipad with ‘sexy pants’ en­graved on it af­ter too many glasses of wine. He got an ipad case to cover it up.” – Leila, 26

“I was boozily brows­ing a site called Artfinder, and or­dered a paint­ing of a llama with the words, ‘Bo­hemian Llama says drink good beer’ on it. What was I think­ing?” – Jen, 29

“I signed up to a UNISA un­der­grad­u­ate course in clas­si­cal stud­ies, and had to phone them the next day to ex­plain. Worst hang­over ever.” – Lorna, 29

“I bought aero­plane tick­ets to New York on a credit card, and com­pletely for­got un­til I got the flight re­minder email a week be­fore I was due to leave, and then had to go.” – Emma, 26

“An in­spired ‘busi­ness plan’ came to me over a bot­tle of Mer­lot. The re­sult was 3 000 glass beads for my ‘jew­ellery em­pire’. My house­mate nearly wet her­self laugh­ing when she signed for the de­liv­ery.” – Ju­lia, 30

Newspapers in English

Newspapers from South Africa

© PressReader. All rights reserved.