Love The friendlover balance

We hope our BFFS and partners will get along – but even when they don’t, there’s a way to juggle romance with your social circle.

You think your friends are the greatest things since Gummy Bears; your significant other thinks theirs are the next Will and Grace. So what could be better than everyone hanging out, hosting braais, taking holidays together and, you know, possibly marrying off in one big group wedding? Well, we’re sorry to say, there’s a lot more to it. The things you respect in a friend might not coincide with what your partner looks for in theirs. You might not even like their friends. (In fact, we guarantee you’ll detest at least one.) Still, spending time among each other’s social circles is a great way to learn more about the person you’re with, how they relate to people and what they value most. And don’t forget, you’ll surely get to hear some hilarious stories from their past. Here are four guidelines for making it work. Host a fun-hearted game night or awards-show viewing party and see what happens. Success? Then gather everyone (again!) for a flash-mob dance of joy, because this is a real winwin! Just don’t spend all of your time together – you still need intimate couple time, introspective alone time and precious one-onone time with the people you care about. This may be the more likely scenario. Chances are, your uber-wealthy trust-fund BFF and your partner’s art-school pal won’t fall in love at first sight. So don’t It’s one thing for your friend not to like your significant other’s friends, but what if she doesn’t like your significant other? Take a step back and try to look at your relationship with as much clarity as possible. Is there merit to your friend’s scepticism – have you been blinded by love? Or is the issue with your friend, not your sweetheart?

If it’s the latter, tread lightly, but ask the friend to meet up and talk it out. Explain how much both she and your partner mean to you, and see if there’s a way to meet in the middle.