Feel Sexy At Any Size

You have the right to…

Glamour (South Africa) - - Sex - – Lau­ren Brick­man, come­di­enne

“Here’s some feed­back I got on a script I coau­thored: ‘I don’t be­lieve some­one like you could sleep with a guy like that.’ The pro­ducer didn’t think an au­di­ence would be­lieve that a plus-size woman could date a hot celebrity. I smiled, bit my tongue and cut the scene. But I won­dered, ‘Why couldn’t a plus-size woman get a hot guy?’

“I’ve been med­i­tat­ing on that ques­tion since I was 16. While at a party, I was shocked to re­alise I’d caught the eye of a guy, and I rel­ished in his flir­ta­tion un­til a woman pulled me aside to cau­tion me that he was a ‘chubby chaser’. Out of that night came a life­long anx­i­ety: all men who hit on me might have a fat-girl fetish.

“I didn’t ques­tion that nar­ra­tive un­til I was at uni­ver­sity. There I met men from cul­tures with more in­clu­sive beauty ideals. Men in pubs were ask­ing for my num­ber. I was feel­ing sexy for the first time. I went home and ex­plored this side of my­self.

“I wasn’t cured overnight. I dated a clas­si­cally good-look­ing guy years later, and in­se­cu­rity reared its ugly head. I’d roll my eyes ev­ery time he called me sexy. Look­ing back, it wasn’t my body that was hold­ing me back; it was my mind. For too long I’ve al­lowed my in­se­cu­ri­ties to bring out the worst in me. I gave away the power to de­ter­mine my sex­ual worth, but I’m tak­ing it back. I may wear dou­ble-digit dresses, but it’s 2017, and I have a right to feel sexy. I’ve re­alised: I could get the ‘hot’ guy; I’m in­tel­li­gent and sexy as hell. I be­lieve it and so should you.”

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