Message to my child’s killer
Sue Maclennan
EThe mother of a young man killed in a hit-and-run nearly a year ago has asked for the driver to come forward and apologise. reports thel Moolman is pleased sure, Ethel says. “Ashlin’s cross for the family of muris there. I see it every day, not dered Grahamstown man knowing what went through his Alby Julius that the culprit mind that evening just before was quickly tracked down. he died.
Julius was murdered just “I didn’t see what happened, over a month ago, on 5 Aubut I was there moments after gust. Last week his killer was the accident happened – and put behind bars for life. that picture keeps on coming
But as the anniversary of her into my mind. son Ashlin Moolman’s death “It’s like Ashlin was killed like in a hit-and-run accident apa dog and just lay there. proaches, this quick resolution “The people passed, and they at the same time rubs salt in went and looked… perhaps the Ethel’s wounds. guilty person also looked at
Ashlin was chatting with him. friends on the verge near the “To them maybe it was just family’s Currie Street home in another person that’s been the early hours of Saturday 19 killed. September last year when a “Accidents do happen, but car struck him and Curt Canyou know okay, that’s the cause, non, then a matric pupil at and that’s who is responsible. Graeme College. “But in this case, there’s no
Ethel is a nurse and she was body coming up to us and sayone of the first people called ing, ‘Look, I’m the guilty person. to the scene. Will you please forgive me?’
She administered first aid “Nobody can just come and on her own son until the parasay, ‘I’m sorry’. That’s all I want medics arrived. to hear,” Ethel said.
Ashlin died there, metres “It’s not that I didn’t say away from the house where he goodbye properly to him while grew up. Cannon was injured he was still alive. and recovered in hospital. “It’s that, okay there are peo
A 30-year-old man later ple who you know are going to handed himself over to the die because they’re sick. And police and a case of culpable there’s people whose death you homicide was opened. don’t expect.
However, on 4 December “We didn’t expect Ashlin to the case was withdrawn after die.” For Ethel it’s not about it was established that the acthe sentence, it’s about that accused had been asleep in the knowledgement. car at the time of the incident “Come to me, come face and couldn’t remember who me and say, ‘Mrs Moolman’, or the driver was. ‘Ethel’, or ‘Auntie Ethel – I’m so
“That man came to me the sorry: I’m the one’. Tuesday after the accident. He “Then I’ll let the Lord do his was crying and said, ‘ I’m so thing. It’s all I want to know. sorry for what happened, but Ashlin was Ethel’s second I can’t remember that night’,” child – born 16 years after Ethel told Grocott’s Mail, days Nicky (now Sias). before the anniversary of Ash“When I fell pregnant with lin’s roadside death. Ethel Ashlin, everybody was really finds it hard to believe that excited, and since he was born, the identity of the driver could he was this happy child.” be difficult to establish – and it Ethel points to a photobreaks her heart. graph of Ashlin on the wall of
“Just now I greet the person the lounge at the Currie Street who killed my son and I don’t home. even know it,” she said. “They In it, Ashlin is standing at a can just smile at me as if nothbraai at the edge of Grey Dam, ing’s happened.” celebrating his 21st birthday.
Another kind of hurt comes He’s smiling at the photografrom some people in the compher – his big sister, Nicky. munity who don’t understand “That last picture of Ashlin the family’s pain. was one of the last happy mo
“One lady said, ‘Oh, she’s a ments in his life – he went out nurse, she’s a strong person – with his friends and his brother she’s used to people that’s dyand sister.” ing,” Ethel explained. Ethel says sometimes she
“And then someone else said, feels guilty, because there are ‘Listen here, that lady is a nurse, parents with children who die, they work with death, but her and they haven’t seen them for child died. That wasn’t a patient years. of hers. That was her child’. “But if those people aren’t go
“And that makes me feel so ing to talk, I need to say someheartbroken. thing so that we can go on with
“On the outside I’m okay, but our lives. on the inside I’m not really.” “We pass Ashlin’s cross every
The Moolmans are a closeday and we have to be strong. knit family, always there for No one can bring Ashlin back. each other – but everyone still But at least an apology will has times when they’re not copmake me feel we can move on.” ing with the knowledge that Because of the stage the case Ashlin has gone. is at, the police have said they
“Sometimes I notice that are not able to comment, and (Ashlin’s younger brother) asked the media to exercise paEuan is struggling – and when tience. he changes his Facebook pro“The docket is with the Direcfile, then I know what it’s about. tor of Public Prosecutions for a
“I don’t know how they exdecision,” police spokesperson pect us to go on.” Captain Luvuyo Mjekula told
What the family needs is clo- Grocott’s Mail yesterday.