Yazi izimpawu zokuba nokhwantalala ufune usizo
UKHWANTALALA yisifo esineminyaka eminingi sikhona, kepha abantu abaningi bebengazi ngaso, nokungasho ukuthi besingabagulisi. Izimpawu zaso futhi bezibonakala kubantu abaningi kodwa ngenxa yokungabi nolwazi olwanele abantu bebegcina bengazi ukuthi umuntu uguliswa yini.
Ukhwantalala aluziveleli kodwa ludalwa yizinto eziningi, ukubala ezimbalwa: izinkinga zobudlelwano bothando nezasemshadweni, izinkinga zokuhlukunyezwa umuntu akhula nakho noma okwenzeke esemdala, ukusebenza kakhulu ngale kokuba nesikhathi esanele sokuphumula nokunye okuningi.
Kumqoka ukwazi ukuthi isifo sokhwantalala akuvamisile ukuthi siqhamuke nje zingazange zibekhona izimpawu ezikhombisa ukuthi umuntu uzoba naso. Lezi zimpawu ziyalapheka uma zisheshe zabonakala zisaqala.
Isifo sokhwantalala siqala ngokuba umuntu abe nengcindezi. Izimpawu zengcindezi kungaba ukuphathwa yikhanda elingapheli, ingcindezi kuyenzeka ikuvusele ukugula obungenakho njengamaulcer, isifo sikashukela, isifo senhliziyo, ukungakwazi ukulala noma ukulala ngokweqile, ukukhohlwa okungajwayelekile, ukwehla kwezinga lokuziphatha emsebenzini, ukuba nolaka, ukucasulwa yizinto ezincane nokuxabana okwenzeka zonke izinsuku nabantu ohlala nabo. Uma ungakutholanga ukwelapheka ungazithola uba nesifo sokwethuka ngokweqile. Lokhu kungabonakala ngokuthi ushaywe wuvalo, ube nobunzima bokuphefumula, ujuluke, okungenzeka uzithole uquleka, lokho kungaholela ekutheni ushone. Ungasizakala ngemishanguzo etholakala kodokotela.
Ukudlula lapho uma ungaselaphi isifo sokwethuka ngokweqile, usungazithola uphathwa ukhwantalala. Lesi sekuyisifo esidlule nemiphefumulo eminingi, ngakho kubalulekile ukuthi siziqondisise kahle izimpawu zaso ukuze usheshe welapheke.
Izimpawu zokhwantalala zifaka kwezinye: ukuhlala udabukile emphefumulweni kuze kube isikhathi esingangeviki noma amabili izinsuku zilandelana, ngokuvamisile usuke ungenayo into eqondile ongathi iyona ekuphethe kabi emoyeni. Ukungakuthandi ukudla noma ukudla ngokweqile kunokujwayelekile, imicabango yokuzibulala ehlala ikufikela ngenxa yokuthi usubona sengathi impilo ayisasho lutho kanti nawe uzibona ungasabalulekile okungenzeka ugcine ngokuzibulala, okunye kungaba ukuzithola unomuzwa wokukhala, kokunye ugcine ungumuntu ohlezi ekhala ngezikhathi ezithile, ukuvilapha okungajwayelekile lapho uvilapha ukwenza noma yini kube sengathi ungazihlalela nje ungazenzi nezinto ezibalulekile, ukwehla kwezinga lokuhlanzeka endaweni ohleli kuyo noma emzimbeni njengokuthi nje uvilaphe nokugeza, ukungathandi ukwenza izinto obujabulela ukuzenza ngaphambilini, ukuba nenhliziyo eshesha icasuke, ukushintsha kwemizwa lapho uzithola khona uthokoze kakhulu uphinde futhi uzithole usudumele ngaphandle kwesizathu esibambekayo, ukuzithola ungakwazi ukulala okanye ulale kuze kweqe kunokujwayelekile noma ke uzithole ulala isikhashana uphinde uvuke kungakasi, ukujula ngemicabango noma ngesimo esithile esingakuphethe kahle emphefumulweni mayela nento eyenzeka kudala noma eqhubeka yenzeka okungenzeka ukuthi ayaziwa ngabanye abantu, ukukhohlwa izinto ezibalulekile ohlala uzenza zonke izinsuku, ukungena shi otshwaleni noma ezidakamizweni ngokweqile, kungaba khona nezinye izimpawu.
Ongakwenza uma uzizwa unezimpawu zokhwantalala ukuthi ukhulume nomuntu omethembayo ngezinkinga nezimfihlo ezikuphazamisayo emphefumulweni, nongakaze uzixoxele muntu. Ungajwayeli ukuba nezimfihlo nokufela ngaphakathi uma unenkinga. Abantu besilisa sekutholakele ukuthi ukhwantalala luvamise ukuba luholele ekutheni bagcine beshonile ngenxa yokuthi bafela ngaphakathi bangakhulumi ngezinkinga zabo.
Nabantwana abancane kuyenzeka babe naso lesi sifo ikakhulukazi labo asebethombile ngenxa yezinkinga zempilo, iningi labo ligcina ngokuzibulala noma lingene ezidakamizweni nasotshwaleni, kokunye bagcine ngokungena kubudlelwano bezothando nocansi olungavikelekile.
Kubalulekile ukuthi abantu abasha sibanikeze indlebe uma befisa ukukhuluma ngezinkinga zabo, singabehluleli noma sibasabise bagcine sebesaba ukukhuluma uma benezinkinga. Okokugcina, umuntu onokhwantalala kumqoka ukuthi esekwe wumndeni wakhe nabasondelene naye, bamkhombise uthando olungenamibandela, uma ezama ukukhuluma ngenkinga yakhe singamuphebezi noma sizibe, kodwa simlalele aze aneliseke ukuthi usekusho konke abefisa ukukusho.
UMnuz Phumlani Mbatha uyi-Psycho-Social Wellness Consultant
(Specializing in Wellness Education)
phumlani.mbatha@gmail. com