Of ‘silencing’ sexual abuse
out the time limit until the Act is amended or 18 months has passed. The Act is currently before Parliament to be amended.
But, says Peters: “The long and short of [the church’s response to us] was for us to go the legal route.
But because of the law on prescription, the likelihood of any success in going that route was scant. So, in effect, it was little more than a silencing.”
Pointing out that Hendricks’s abuser was frequently relocated to different parishes, Weeder says that the church “likes to shift people” once it is rumoured they are sexually abusing children.
“Given that allegations of sexual abuse in the Catholic Church are so rife, one would expect the Anglican Church to be more proactive. The church was very vociferous in opposing state capture, which I fully support. One would have hoped, though, that that same energy could have been directed inward,” Peters adds.
Until the church forces itself to look inward, it appears that it is left to those who have experienced sexual abuse to find their own way through their trauma, in the way Hendricks did by choosing to meet his abuser face to face.
As to whether he found some closure after the meeting, Hendricks says: “The whole conversation was very awkward. His first comment was, like: ‘In your affidavit [to the police], you made me look like a monster.’ He told me that he’s changed, that he went through some counselling through the church. He kept making excuses and not taking any accountability for what he had done.
“I told him that the reason I called him there was twofold: that he apologise to me and also to my parents. You know, they invited him into our house and treated him like gold. But he gave no apology. Nothing. After that meeting, I felt drained … drained.”
“You know,” he adds, “my brother got married about 40 years ago and, on his wedding day, that priest gave my brother and his wife a Bible as a gift. My brother took that Bible with him to our meeting that day at St George’s Cathedral. After the meeting, he gave that Bible back to him. He was angry with [the priest] for what he did to me. I could see he was very, very angry, but all he said when he gave that Bible back was: ‘I don’t see you in this Bible. Go and find yourself in this Bible.’ [My abuser] just stood there, trying to explain himself, but we just walked away. We just walked.”
Months after the meeting, and now living in a different city, Hendricks says: “I’ve recently joined a church, but my heart just isn’t in it.
“But, you know,” he adds, “I still believe.”
Makgoba’s office had not responded to requests for comment at the time of publication.