‘Sumo’ wife takes on ex-hubby

His ‘roving eye’ led her into arms of doctor

HURT that her husband had allegedly likened her to a “sumo wrestler”, saying he would rather go fishing than sleep with her, a KwaZulu-Natal woman has turned the tables on him.

After her now ex-husband allegedly tried to derail her new marriage to a wealthy doctor by hauling him before a Health Professions Council of South Africa tribunal, the scorned woman has laid bare the troubles she claims had doomed their relationship.

Her ex, a 42-year-old auto electrician, claims the general specialist surgeon had wrecked his marriage by having had an inappropriate relationship with his thenwife while she was a patient of his between 2013 and 2014.

The South Coast woman, 37, divorced her husband and married the doctor last year.

The ex-husband had testified in November that the doctor had lured away his wife by buying her a new car and flat.

However, the mother of two, who has been on the witness stand over the past week, sought to debunk his claims, saying their marriage had been over years ago.

“The majority of the time I was left alone. I was not happy,” she said.

The inquiry heard that the couple married in 2000.

She said her husband lived with his parents during the first few months of marriage and thereafter moved into her family home, which she shared with extended family which included her mother, brother, aunt and two cousins.

She realised early on in the marriage that her husband had a “roving eye”, she said, and would make advances towards her cousin, who was 20 years old.

“One Christmas he bought her an entire make-up set and did not even buy me one.”

Affair

But their real problems began when he began having an affair with a pharmacist in July 2004, shortly after the birth of their first child, she said, adding she had seen text messages from her.

“I confronted him about it and he admitted there was another woman.”

She added that her suspicions grew because her husband was private with his cellphone.

She told the inquiry the pharmacist and her mother came to her home where a meeting took place.

“I told my husband to leave because I did not want him anymore but he apologised and said he wanted to work on the marriage.”

She said she agreed for the sake of her child and they went for counselling and got more involved in their church.

The couple then had a religious ceremony but things never worked out.

“He often told me that no one would ever look at or want someone like me. It hurt me deeply. He even mentioned once in the presence of family, after the birth of my second child, that he would rather go fishing than sleep with me.”

She went on to tell the inquiry her husband had compared her to a sumo wrestler.

The inquiry further heard that the complainant did not live up to his financial commitments.

“We lived in my family home and he was responsible for payment of half of the bond and the utilities bill. Most months he paid extremely late or didn’t pay at all. We had to bear the costs of reconnection fees.”

She told the inquiry this caused problems with her family.

“In addition he would take money out of my bank account to pay his staff and I wouldn’t have money to let my debit orders run off.”

She said her husband had borrowed almost R200 000 from her family to start a business and had not paid back a cent.

Testifying again last week, the complainant said he believed he had a strong case against the doctor, who should not have broken up his family.

“Doctors are the fabric of society,” he said.

However, the surgeon’s counsel, advocate Ian Dutton, said his client would deny that he had abused his professional trust between doctor and patient.

Dutton said the matter dealt with the doctor’s private life and had nothing to do with his professional capacity.

But the complainant disagreed. During a heated cross examination, the man said: “I feel doctor... was unprofessional by luring my wife away by offering her financial compensation and using his charm as a doctor.”

In his evidence in-chief, which was heard in November, the man alleged the doctor had bought his wife a brand new car for R190 000 and a flat.

He said he would never accept his divorce.

“My divorce was orchestrated and I was pressured into it. Doctor... even paid for my divorce, so (that) I will accept any terms or conditions of it.”

He said he accepted that his marriage was over and that he did not want the doctor hating him but he believed justice should prevail.

Dutton argued that rich businessmen, not bound by a professional conduct, also used their financial power.

“Hence, this is a social issue. The doctor poached another man’s wife, so he may be excluded from social circles and it may affect his business, but it is a social issue and nothing to do with the inquiry.”

The doctor pleaded not guilty to unprofessional conduct.

In his evidence in chief he said he met the complainant’s wife at work and the two had a collegial relationship.

He said his doctor-patient relationship was only over two days.

He did not believe the woman was with him for financial reasons and found the description of her by her ex as a “trophy wife”, to be derogatory, he said.

The couple feared for their safety after threatening text messages were made, the inquiry heard.

They have sought protection orders against the complainant.

The doctor, who has been married twice before, said some people were happier divorced.

The matter has been adjourned.