Wu Wei yourself to a better life

point. Some try to escape with drinking, drugs or comfort eating to forget about it. Any form of addiction indicates that we are suppressing an inner call to wake up. Even harmless actions approved by society like smoking, working too hard or watching movies non-stop show us that we would rather not.

Then we are pushed over the edge and find ourselves where you are right now. You don’t feel like trusting God and you blame him, because trusting God also did not work, right?

There is a learning model for transformation that explains how we move through life’s lessons. It’s a repetitive pattern and first you go about living with no thought at all, to why life works. But now you are feeling unconscious about what is not working in your life.

The next stage will interest you: you are becoming conscious to be competent again. You do it by becoming aware of what is really going on in your life. Then you will reach the next stage of being consciously competent and life works again, just better.

This is my suggestion: instead of shutting down inside, feeling like you lost what life promised you, try something else. You can blame, or you can open your heart. It is crystal clear to me that you are not giving up, because you have reached out to me.

I will make a deal with you: notice your story and separate your emotions from the facts. Instead of becoming depressed about what you used to believe as truth, recognise a bigger truth behind it.

Notice which beliefs come from authority role models, like parents. That is not really who you are. And instead of acting out to God for letting you down, just believe in you. You are enough.

When you can separate your emotions from the facts of what is happening to you. Consider a brand new concept called Wu Wei. Wikipedia explains this Chinese concept as “non-doing”, an action that does not involve struggle or excessive effort.

Give yourself permission to allow life to just flow and consciously observe without a need to control anything. Emotions that come up will be seen for how they exist because of unrealistic expectations, and this will lead you to acceptance without depression. Give up what you expected from yourself and be who you really are.

Adelé Green is a transformation specialist coach assisting with big life changes and the international author of Can You See Me Naked. Send your question by visiting www.adele-green.com/askadele/ You can hear her on #360Brunch at noon on Sundays on Mix93.8FM.