Age antics of men and women

It’s true, even men lie about their age

They say asking a woman her age is one of the rudest things to do.

While it is universally accepted that women tend to lie about their age, what most people do not know is that some men lie about their age too.

The reasons vary and some men lie for professional reasons, like Hollywood actor Lawrence Fishburne, who reportedly lied about being 16 in 1976 to score a role as 17-year-old Tyrone Miller in the blockbuster movie, Apocalypse Now.

Fishburne was only 14 years old at the time.

Also, who could forget the scandal that was reported by Sunday Sun in 2014 when it was alleged that the late Bafana Bafana and Orlando Pirates goalkeeper Senzo Meyiwa had shaved five years off his age after it was discovered that he had a twin, Siya, who was born in 1982, while Senzo had claimed to be born in 1987.

Many have speculated that he concealed his real age in order to meet the age requirements to play for Pirates.

But some men lie about their age in relationships in order to appear older and to avoid being thought of as immature, just like 26-yearold Meadowlands, Soweto, resident Tebatso [not his real name] does.

He says he escalates his age because he likes older women and does not want to be considered a “Ben 10”.

“I do look like I’m in my early 30s, so the age I usually go with is 31 or 30,” he says.

“I am not immature by any means and I prefer to date mature women who know what they want and have a good head on their shoulders.

‘‘ A girlfriend constantly called me a ‘born free’. It’s disheartening

“However, in my experience, whenever a woman in her 30s found out that I was still in my 20s, they would be turned off.

“Everything could have been going well until the age topic came about. Suddenly, everything would be about how young I am, even during petty arguments. I even had a girlfriend who constantly called me a ‘born free’. It is so disheartening.”

Tebatso says his current girlfriend, who is 32, does not know his real age.

Relationship counselor Lethabo Ntsasa says there is an interesting dynamic between men and women when it comes to lying about age.

“Women tend to lie down and men tend to lie up. For most women, they tend to lie about being younger in order to come across as youthful and vibrant,” says Ntsasa.

The stereotype is often that when a woman acts younger than her age, she is overreaching and afraid to age. Most people find it inappropriate and unbecoming. This is why women of a particular age are prescribed “age appropriate” clothing, make-up and even jewellery.

“Often when women lie about their age they are trying not to be judged for acting how they feel,” says Ntsasa.

“If they feel younger whereas their age disagrees with them, society can be harsh and they can even be called names like ‘cougars’.

“When men lie about their age they tend to add years to their real age in order to come across as mature.

“So men often lie to be validated as the mature men they believe themselves to be.”