A man of simple tastes
Speaking of money, the Minister of Candy Crush tabled his first and what many predict and hope was his last budget on Wednesday. Mr Gigabyte, as his wife calls him, told the nation we will pay more VAT, a higher fuel levy and more personal income tax to make up for the money stolen by uBaba ka Duduzane’s thieving friends, the Guptas. Candy
Crusher’s speech was well received by the markets, with the rand firming ever further. However, he almost messed it up by quoting what he called an “urban poet” when he tried to convince us things were not that bad. Old Hogarth knows very little about popular culture, but the Grammy-winning hip-hop artist Kendrick Lamar is no urban poet. Let’s hope ratings agencies won’t drop the mic on us for having a finance minister who plays Candy Crush and listens to rap music with “explicit content”.