Meal club gets parents mixing

School backs suppers to promote racial harmony, discourse

● Addressing the thorny issue of transformation seems to be a lot easier to swallow seated around a dinner table, a private school in Johannesburg is discovering.

And it would seem a generous helping of table talk is also the way to go for a journalist and advertising executive, who have started hosting suppers to get people of all races talking about issues affecting them.

Pridwin Preparatory is encouraging parents of all races to invite other parents to their homes for supper every month “to have meaningful conversations about transformation in the school and . . . community”.

Principal Selwyn Marx started the first supper club last year with a group of parents whose children were in different grades. It was such a success that it prompted the school to introduce it to parents of pupils in Grades 0 and 1 this year. Six couples — two white, two black African and a Muslim couple and a Hindu couple, all with Grade 0 pupils — have agreed to participate.

Marx told parents that part of the school’s role was to teach pupils about social thinking. “We need to grow their capacity to be aware of their own and other persons’ thoughts, emotions, beliefs and intentions. This strengthens their social skills and thereby their abilities to work effectively in different social and cultural contexts.”

Marx said children performed better in schools where the parents were “personally invested in their children’s education”.

Supper club participants, preferably numbering no more than 12, “must be committed and be prepared to stay the course. They cannot attend irregularly.”

Marx said the couple hosting the dinner had to write up their reflections on the event, which would be discussed by the school board. The school was planning to eventually establish a supper club in all grades.

Discussions from last year’s supper club resulted in workshops for teachers.

Thabo Ntseare, a parent of a Grade 1 pupil at Pridwin, said: “Kids learn a lot from their parents from a culture point of view, so that’s why they’re trying to get their parents to understand each other’s culture and background in a relaxed environment.”

A parent in last year’s supper club, Winston Monale, said it was courageous of Pridwin “to acknowledge that the school has to transform in some shape or form”.

He said: “There were Jewish parents, Muslim, black and white parents, so there was a good cross-section of what the school looks like, so clearly you were going to have different views.” The engagement, although heated at times, was “quite respectful”.

Nene Molefi, a transformation consultant and MD of a human resource consultancy, said Pridwin’s supper club was “an excellent initiative”. She cautioned, however, that if discussions were not facilitated well when “buttons are pressed”, it could end up with “negative unfinished business and conflict”.

St John’s Preparatory School in Johannesburg also hosts “parent conversation evenings”, at which parents are encouraged to talk and “work together to create a transformed community”.

Media24 journalist Jo Prins and Melusi Tshabalala, the managing partner at advertising agency Studio 214, are also hosting suppers to get people talking about issues affecting them, including transformation. Dubbed Ubudlelwano, Zulu for relationship, their first supper, at a renovated church in Melville last weekend, was attended by about 15 white and seven black people.

Prins said they wanted to get people from different races talking over a glass of wine and a plate of food.

“The whole idea is to get a couple of young black guys shaking hands with 40something white guys who otherwise don’t have that sort of connection.”

Tshabalala, who has become popular teaching social media users Zulu one word at a time, said that through his teaching he had found that people “who would otherwise not interact with each other” were talking and becoming friends.

[Club members] must be prepared to stay the course Principal Selwyn Marx