Sunday Times

Tightheads & Loose Balls

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● We’re not entirely sure who to point an accusing finger at, but only 8 500 spectators bothered to show up for the Crusaders’ Super Rugby quarterfin­al against the Sharks last week. Was it the Cantabrian­s’ way of keeping their money in their wallet for the semis and the final, or have the Sharks been that drab to warrant such a mass stayaway?

● There was a time when Trevor Nyakane used to dance on the field, especially when he celebrated tries with Raymond Rhule at the Cheetahs. Their “Pumba and Timon” routine got plenty of airtime but they eventually parted ways in opposite directions. One half of the act reprised his role last week and the evidence was provided by the tighthead prop’s Instagram page. Nyakane let it all hang out at former teammate Rudy Paige’s wedding where he literally made the circle bigger. For a big man, Nyakane is pretty nimble and, clearly, he hasn't got two left feet.

● Tightheads were a little aghast this week when it read an open letter Western Province president Thelo Wakefield directed at former Springbok and Stormers captain Corne Krige. The latter had been critical of the Western Province Rugby Football Union’s management and Wakefield decided he’d have his five cents worth in retaliatio­n. He should really spend his time more productive­ly, like restoring the once mighty union’s battered reputation.

● Tightheads overheard an interestin­g bit of banter while eating a boerie roll at Ellis Park last week. Not far off a few players and officials were munching away when one mischievou­sly piped up. “Early in the game, maybe you should give Israel Folau a kiss at the bottom of the ruck.” Thankfully the conversati­on didn’t descend into talk of illegal entries at the ruck.

● Speaking of the Waratahs, prop Tom Robertson was presented for media interviews at the team’s training ground last week. It was difficult to look the Wallaby in the eye. He arguably has Australia’s most celebrated cauliflowe­r ear. The line of interrogat­ion didn’t turn to his ear, but he did indicate in an earlier interview that he had drained the offending ear with a paper clip. His doctor and his mom have also been tasked with draining the gnarly outcrop.

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