‘I ONCE THREW A MESSAGE-IN-A-BOTTLE OFF A GAY SAILING BOAT’
I would describe myself as “a traveller”.
Travel and acting have similarities actually: both require a sense of curiosity and a willingness to move out of your comfort zone.
Growing up in Cape Town, my childhood holidays were mostly camping on the Garden Route. I’d make a bed on top of all the luggage in the back of the car and lie there reading comics, in-between fighting with my siblings. Once, one of my comics slipped out of the window and disintegrated into a shower of pages along the highway. I was inconsolable.
When I was 20 I sailed across the Atlantic in a 50ft sailboat.
Seeing no land for 21 days is a wild experience. We’d take turns keeping watch alone on deck, the night so black you’d see a light on the horizon and think it was finally another vessel, until you realised you were watching the stars rise. One night there was phosphorescence in the water and we tied ropes around our waists and swam. I painted a letter about our trip — the self-proclaimed first transatlantic crossing by an all-gay crew — and sealed it in a bottle and threw it overboard. Thirteen years later someone found it in Bermuda and e-mailed the captain with a photo.
My best place in the world for a night out is Berlin but only if you know some locals.
Berliners protect their party scene and tourists will likely get bounced, so befriend some Berliners and you’ll have the best night of your life. Use dating apps to find out where the locals like to party.
My favourite international city is Berlin. The theatre, art and fashion is so cutting edge and there is a strong counterculture. On my perfect day there, I would wake up at 2pm; walk along the River Spree; have coffee and a pretzel; visit a museum; then do dinner at whatever pop-up restaurant is on everyone’s hot list. Next I’d see a show at the Schaubühne [theatre] and head to a dive bar before going home to change. At 2am, I’d head to a party at a location only disclosed on a select WhatsApp group — information procured by using dating apps for advice. Bed at 8am.
I travelled solo for a year between school and university working my way around the world on sailboats. It was a seminal experience. I cried for no reason sometimes but I also had the best adventures of my life. I think solo travel is fundamental to connecting to yourself.
If I were to host a tourist in Cape Town, I’d start with a kayak off Mouille Point or do the classic Peninsula drive from Cape Town to Hout Bay. I’d take them hiking at Orange Kloof, the best-kept secret in Cape Town and one of my favourite places to spend a day. Then I’d take them for sundowners at Cosy Bay and end the night with dinner at Between Us or Ouzeri and a dance at Halo or Modular.
My worst travel experience was when I proposed in the Maldives.
We decided to avoid the expensive resort islands and visit the newly-opened-for-tourists local islands. After all, it’s the same gloriously clear ocean, right? Wrong. After a hellish, three-hour speedboat ride where vomit sloshed around on the floor, we arrived at a grubby island to hosts who had no clue. The food was a can of tuna and rice, day in and day out. I proposed on a little atol but we had to pretend to be “brothers” for the rest of the trip as the culture is not queer-friendly. If you’re travelling to the Maldives, take a sea plane to your island and don’t spend more than two hours in Malé.
I found the locals especially tricky in Sweden. You can’t split a bill in a restaurant – even in a group of 10, one person must pay. “We don’t do that” is a standard response to any question. At Christmas, though, the lights in Stockholm are magical enough to warm one to the brusque hospitality. I found it helps to stay in expensive hotels.
The Dutch don’t like you to browse, or “um and ah” about what to order. You must know what you want. I, like many South Africans, like to consider my options and it drives them nuts. They literally just walk away.
This interview has been edited for space. Read the full version at sundaytimes.co.za.
● Catch Chouler in Spring Awakening, on now at Theatre on the Bay in Cape Town until April 6. It runs at Pieter Toerien’s Theatre at Montecasino from April 12 - May 5. Tickets through webtickets.co.za.