ADHD & EMOTIONAL REGULATION

Emotions are a normal part of human nature. They help us to understand our needs and wants, and are an important aspect when building relationships. Emotional regulation helps us to behave appropriately in various contexts and forms an essential part of well-being. We learn from a young age to regulate our emotions. Initially caregivers fulfil this role by giving physical comfort and care. Babies learn to self-soothe from an early age by sucking a dummy, and as they grow older, they turn their heads or crawl away from something unpleasant. Although self-regulation starts early, infants cannot fully regulate on their own. Parents play a crucial part when it comes to emotional regulation for the toddler, the youngster and even the teenager. As a parent, it is your job to “hold” the emotions at times and to guide the child through the process of regulation.

“During emotional regulation, people may increase, maintain, or decrease positive and negative emotions. Accordingly, emotional regulation often involves changes in emotional responding.” (Koole, 2009) People use emotional strategies and coping strategies on a conscious and unconscious level throughout the day.

As children grow, their brains keep on developing and with it their capacity to self-regulate up until adulthood. Parents sometimes have the expectation that their teenagers must be able to regulate their emotions like an adult. This is developmentally not possible, especially because their frontal lobes and abstract thinking are still developing. Frontal lobes only mature in early adulthood.