Violence hits home and it hurts

The death of Skwatta Kamp rapper Nkululeko Habedi, known as Flabba, on Monday morning left the country reeling in shock once again at yet another senseless murder. Everyone’s thoughts are with his family and friends at a time when trying to understand a pointless death just leaves us at a loss. These murderous acts happen daily and thousands of unknown people suffer similar, unreported, fates. Violence and murder is a cancer destroying the soul of this country.

Armed robberies, hijackings, crimes of passion, domestic violence and reckless driving fill the pages of this and other newspapers.

Police commissioner Riah Phiyega and President Jacob Zuma speak about the government and police’s plans to combat violent crimes. That is all well and good and all South Africans support every effort to try make our country a place where citizens and visitors are, and feel, safe. However, there is only so much legislation and police action plans can do, because behind closed doors – and in the absence of organised crime syndicates or known hotspots – men and women are subjected to the most obscene violence by lovers, parents, friends and community members.

Even the opening of one of the most revered institutions of tolerance and democracy in this country was not immune from violence. Watching scenes unfold at the State of the Nation address and seeing the circulating pictures of a woman with a swollen and bloodied face left a bitter taste and concern for the very fabric of our society. Many callers to radio stations said it was “good”, it was “right”, “teach them a lesson”. A punch here … a kick there, where does it end?

Reeva Steenkamp, Nkululeko Habedi and Taliep Petersen; murder-suicides; the woman next door; the man across the street; and the child sitting bruised in the back of the class are all victims of a sick society damaged and reeling from trauma. A crime victim is often sent for trauma counselling and South Africa as a country is reeling from trauma. And it’s not just behind closed doors. Xenophobic attacks, outrageous violence during protests, the Marikana massacre and vigilante killings demonstrate violence is endemic.

It is up to all of us to help police by starting to live in a way that promotes respect and dignity. We can blame everyone else, but when that door closes it is just us and the ones we love most.