A legacy of dirt in future digs

What will archaeologists find in a million years’ time reflective of this millennium? That’s if this world still exists. Who knows, the planet might well then consist of robots – no skin, bones and blood around.

As a consequence, human medical teams would probably be replaced by robotic mechanics and engineers repairing rusty and worn tin parts.

That aside, what will we leave behind to intrigue scientists in the far-off future? Probably bits and pieces of I-pads, earphones, keyboards and associated items that kept us from socialising, making us a bunch of introverted zombies. Or matric certificates with a 35% pass rate.

Or, tear sheets with the word “Hansard” just distinguishable. Another word, “Honourable”, is on most pages. It takes the diggers some time to figure it to be a record of parliamentary sessions evidently attended by highly intelligent and respected people. Hey?

The digs undoubtedly unearth bloodied weapons of war used by extremists to kill, maim and torture innocent civilians refusing to adhere to their brand of thug theology. Scientists are at a loss to understand how love and tolerance, claimed to be the golden thread running through all religions, co-exists with hatred and intolerance.

A can of Doom found wrapped in a hymn book is also puzzling. Sinners attracting flies?

Or, what looked at first like a swimming pool. But instead of swimming costumes, sun block and empty beer cans, there is firefighting gear enough to save a whole city. What also catches their eye is a loin cloth of animal skin floating on the top. Could it have belonged to a lone swimmer protected from serious fire hazards?

But what is particularly overwhelming are the tons of pill boxes found at most diggings. Labels indicating doctors’ prescriptions for headaches, sinusitis, the trots, bad breath, in-grown toenail and constipation. You name it. They conclude this millennium consists of sick people – or a case of serious hypochondria.

I’m thinking of packing a trunk filled with some good things and bury it deep to last long enough for scientists to discover. Items to show not all of us are bossies.

For starters, how about biltong, koeksisters, and a copy of The Citizen without Zuma hogging the front page?