Single-mom groups work better
DIFFERENT NEEDS: ‘I COULD NOT RELATE FULLY TO THE MARRIED, STAY-AT-HOME MOTHERS’ What helps is someone who understands your circumstances.
As a single mom, allow me to share how I have navigated motherhood and the need to create a support group just for mothers. Motherhood is a beautiful yet challenging journey. Single motherhood is even more challenging.
The day I became a mother, a single mom to be specific, I made every effort to join all mom groups possible in my area because I knew about the challenges of the journey I was about to embark on, and I did not want to go through it alone.
So I attended every one of the groups I found on social media. I had a mothers’ group to go to almost every day.
I’m so glad I did that as it helped me feel like I’m not alone.
To be surrounded by mothers who were going through a similar journey encouraged me.
As much as it was helpful, I realised I was always the one single mom who could not relate fully to all the other moms.
Most of them were married, stay-at-home moms living comfortable lives. And I was a single still-studying-and-looking-for-ajob mother.
I felt a bit like I didn’t quite fit in. I then started looking specifically for single mom groups and found none. Absolutely none.
Since being under lockdown I have to be honest and say it has been a bit more challenging than usual. I have felt lonely, frustrated, discouraged, exhausted and overwhelmed.
Under normal circumstances, when I feltlike this (which is often) I could easily call a friend to meet up, drop my daughter off with a friend and have some me time (which I have not had since the lockdown).
I could go out with her to the park, beach or a restaurant. And it certainly helped me to feel better.
However, these are not normal circumstances.
The best I can do during this time is to turn to God for strength.
I recently found myself searching for single mom support groups again (I don’t give up) and I did find a few, but all were far away from me.
At this point, I told myself that I would take it upon myself to create a platform for single moms in my area.
I know there are plenty of us in this situation. I’ve also realised that sometimes you don’t even need much, just for someone to say, “I understand, I know how you feel, I’ve been there and you are not alone.”
That in itself can be enough to push us to keep going.
I decided to create a support group on Facebook and Instagram – Dear Single Mama – in the hope that other single mamas searching find it and we can all support each other.
I’ve been there and you are not alone
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