Frustrations can be valuable

THIS past week has been tr ying.

Conversations have been difficult; those around me have seemed set on presenting problems instead of opportunities and I have been frustrated at wasted time and resources. In trying to find a way to deal with these frustrations, I found an article written by Catherine Pratt on www.LifeWithConfidence.com. Pratt takes an interesting perspective on frustrations.

A quote from Albert Einstein forms the basis of her ideas; “In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity”. Here is what Pratt taught me:

ý “Frustrations can indicate that you need to take a step back”.

When we are repeatedly frustrated, we may be getting feedback from the world around us that we need to pause and reflect on whether we are still on the path to achieving our intended goal.

Our thoughts and behaviours are easily side-tracked by the agendas of others, by what seems to be “right” at a particular point in time or by a lack of focus.

Refocusing our attention on our intended goals, allows us the opportunity to check how we may have been side-tracked and which of our current thoughts, actions and interactions are problematic.

ý “Roadblocks can be an excellent opportunity to brainstorm.. Having recognised that the path we are on is causing frustrations, provides the springboard for a new path.

Brainstorming solutions, new ways of working towards our goals, shifts us into a forward-thinking mode that can be energising, the opposite of what we feel when we are frustrated. It may be helpful to ask for input from friends and colleagues; just give them the background so that they do not suggest ideas that you have already tried. Rehashing tried and tested ideas will only frustrate you further.

ý “Problems can be a sign that you need a break”.

Repeated frustrations can sometimes mean that we struggle to shift perspectives or brainstorm. In this case, a complete break from what we are doing can serve us well.

Getting away from the frustrating situation and doing some exercise (a brisk walk around the office or a kick boxing sessions, depending on your levels of frustration) will usually help to clear the cobwebs in your mind and you may also relax enough to get the creative cogs turning.

Removing yourself from a frustrating situation can also give you the headspace to gain a fresh perspective; one that has the potential to create ideas about how to move forward. Acknowledging that change is necessary and being willing to make that change are not easy. These three simple steps can be the required catalyst for change:

ý Be in the present: thinking back to all the times a particular objective has not been met or simply wishing you were in a future place where the frustrations no longer exist is not helpful.

Rather, accept the situation you find yourself in, calm your mind and focus on what is happening around you right now; an alarm sounding, birds singing, traffic. Then, try to identify the source of your frustration.

ý Focus on what you have at your disposal: looking at the positives in your life will help to shift to a solution-based mindset.

ý Focus on what you can do right now: identify small steps that you can take immediately to change your situation

I have learnt to be more mindful and to see frustration as feedback; feedback that what I am currently doing is not serving me and that I need to make a change. And, in the words of Alexi Panos, “feedback is my friend”.

I need to listen to that friend and I need to respond appropriately.