Traditional schools
IF THE devil could have thrown his net… Seldom do you get together under one roof such a collection of rapscallions as at the annual Traditional Schools Lunch at Salt Rock.
And they’re a really ancient bunch of rapscallions – balding, greying, portly, wrinkled – heavens, they’re showing the years these days; it makes we sprightly fellows quite uncomfortable. Guest speaker John Robbie seemed the youngest there.
Also astonishing is the decadent sense of humour these ancient codgers display. They clicked immediately with the salacious and unrepeatable jokes of MC Pat Smythe (aka Spyker Koekemoer) and were rocking with laughter. Shocking – men their age with their minds on… oh let’s skip it.
Pat (an alumnus of Isipingo Primary) learned his trade at Duikers Rugby Club dinners, so nuff said. He also produced a barrage of Irish jokes for the mercidler@inl.co.za
benefit of John Robbie, who played rugby for Ireland and the British Lions before coming out here to play for Transvaal, then settling in as a radio, TV and print media commentator on all kinds of things, not just rugby.
But John gave back as good as he got. I have the impression though that, scanning the almost 200 fellows packed into the dining room at the Salt Rock Hotel, he felt a little apprehensive, as if he were revisiting Empangeni Rugby Club, where he was once guest speaker at their annual dinner. (And indeed, a sprinkling of Empangeni Rugby Club fellows were there – even at Empangeni they have to go to school, you see. Two were at our table.) John said the dinner at Empangeni Rugby Club started rather late. Then, just as it seemed to be getting into its stride, he telling them entertaining stories about his time with Ireland and the Lions – which he does very well – half the fellows stripped stark naked and ran outside to play touch rugby in the pouring rain, which soon developed into full-on tackling rugby.
“Is it always like this?” he asked one of the Empangeni honchos.
“No, sometimes it gets out of hand.”
The anecdote seemed to enthuse the Empangeni fellows present. One at our table launched into a lively account of matches between Empangeni and Richards Bay. It sounded like the Wars of the Roses.
Yes, the traditional schools – Hilton, Michaelhouse, Maritzburg College, St Charles, Kearsney, Glenwood, DHS, Westville, Northwood – they’re the glue of our society.
The fellows were still milling about the lunch tables when I had to leave about 6pm for the Jazzy Rainbow, in Durban. They were