Tailpiece

Years’ War last?

Which country makes Panama hats?

From which animal do we get catgut?

In which month do Russians celebrate the October Revolution?

What is a camel’s hair brush made of ?

The Canary Islands in the Atlantic are named after what?

What was King George VI’s first name? What colour is a purple finch? Where are Chinese gooseberries from?

What is the colour of the black box in a commercial aeroplane?

Answers:116 years; Ecuador; sheep and horses; November; squirrel fur; dogs; Albert; crimson; New Zealand; orange.

You’ve gotta be up early to beat the quiz maestros at the Street Shelter for the Over-Forties.

Now destitute

PARK bench interview with a homeless man:

“Up until last week, I still had it all. I had plenty to eat, my clothes were washed and pressed, I had a roof over my head, I had TV and Internet and I went to the gym, the pool and the library.

“I was working on my MBA on-line. I had no bills and no debt. I even had full medical and dental coverage.”

“What happened? Drugs? Alcohol? Divorce?”

“Oh no, nothing like that. I just got out of prison.” A HALF-DROWNED man washes up on Addington beach. A team from the hospital rush down and give resuscitation. They put him on a stomach pump. Litres of salt water come gushing out, seaweed, some small fish and crabs.

It goes on and on. There seems no end to it. Salt water, seaweed, fish, crabs.

A bystander taps one of the doctors on the shoulder. “Excuse me, I’m an engineer. Shouldn’t you take the bottom end out of the water?”

Last word

A GOOD novel tells us the truth about its hero; but a bad novel tells us the truth about its author. – G K Chesterton