Reflections on the Gupta empire
TODAY we discuss the Gupta empire. No, it didn’t start in Saxonwold about nine years ago, as many imagine. It was begun in India in the year 320 by a man named Sri Gupta.
By the year 550 the Gupta empire covered much of the Indian subcontinent. Notable rulers were Chandragupta I, Samudragupta and Chandragupta II. Yet another was Skandagupta.
But the Gupta empire went into decline, under military pressure from the Huns, and was eventually dismembered. It is presumed that the present-day Gupta dynasty is of the Skandagupta branch and…
“What does all this have to do with the price of eggs? – Ed.”
“Nothing, but it’s better than discussing the rugby – Idl.”
“Take the pain, discuss the rugby – Ed.” “Okay – Idl.”
Match analysis
O WEE, O wee! All kinds of horrid jokes are doing the rounds.
“The Boks did win the toss – but from there it was downhill.”
The delicatessen advert: “Our samoosas have three points – that’s better than the Boks!”
Then that perfectly hideous image on social media of a baboon peering up the backside of another baboon,
with the caption: “Looking for the Bok game plan.” (Social media is a menace and should be banned!).
’Tis most painful, to be sure. But we need to grit our teeth and face reality. New Zealand rugby has gone up a couple of gears; ours is stuck in third with a slipping clutch.
It’s pointless to blame the current players or coaches. The reality is that we haven’t adapted to professionalism.
Go back to 1995 when we won the World Cup against the All Blacks. Our fellows then had been through the process of rugby at school, club, provincial and finally international levels.
Club, provincial and international overlapped. The Currie Cup competition was the fierce furnace that produced our Springbok sides. The club championship in Durban every Easter saw Bok and provincial caps on the field. Strong club rugby produced even stronger provincial rugby.
Today? There’s nothing wrong with schools rugby but club rugby has been more or less abandoned and the Currie Cup has been watered down.
But we have Super Rugby, you say? Boys, it’s not the same, it hasn’t worked. Just look at the empty stadiums, they tell a story.
Compare with professional club rugby in Europe. The stadiums (admittedly smaller) are packed and buzzing. There’s enthusiasm, gees.
Then, of course, the conveyor belts. There’s one between the South Sea islands and New Zealand, bringing in huge, astonishingly fast fellows. There’s another between South Africa and Europe, taking out hundreds of our top players. There are said to be 300 or so overseas at any one time. That’s 20 teams.
These surely are issues our rugby administrators have to address. The amateur set-up will never return. But adjustments are needed to what we have. A start surely would be to reinvigorate club rugby – get the top players involved again – and stop the watering down of the Currie Cup.
Then persuade the politicos to get the currency back to a level where players don’t get drawn overseas in such numbers. Hoo boy! A mountain lies ahead.
Pageantry
HOW do you tell the difference between Mrs Universe and Miss Universe? Mrs is the one with a featherduster in her hand, it’s a kind of baton of authority. It’s most distressing this controversy that has erupted over the recent Mrs Universe pageant in Durban, all kinds of allegations of malfeasance by Mrs Latin USA. It needs to be sorted out pronto before the brand is damaged.
Also because it would be unfortunate to delay progress to arranging pageants to choose Aunty Universe and eventually Granny Universe.
And of course it doesn’t stop there. Mr Universe cannot be left to stand lonely in the pantheon of honorifics. Soon enough we will have Uncle Universe, Brother-inlaw Universe and Grandpa Universe. Perhaps also Best Buddy Universe and Drinking Pal Universe.
The pageants roll on… to the ends of the universe.
Tailpiece
PADDY and Mick jump off a cliff edge, each clutching a budgie in both hands. They land in a tangled, bloody heap at the bottom.
Says Paddy: “Mick, dis budgie jumpin’ ain’t all it’s cracked up to be.”
Last word
DISBELIEF in magic can force a poor soul into believing in government and business. – Tom Robbins