I’m worried my daughter’s choice in baby names may affect my grandchild’s future

Q. My daughter is about to have her first child. We’re all hugely excited, and my husband and I have spent plenty of time helping her and her husband get the nursery ready.

They’ve recently found out they’re having a girl and the conversation has, of course, turned to names.

I’m very concerned about the ones they’re suggesting: the most worrying include Pixie-Rose and Primrose Bean.

Cutesy names may suit a baby, but what about when they grow up and start school? And later, when they have a career? I’m worried they won’t be taken seriously. I’ve tried to suggest more sensible names but been told I’m being old-fashioned. What shall I do? FIRST of all: congratulations! It’s so lovely you’ll soon be a grandmother – I can hugely recommend it.

And your daughter is lucky to have you so close and so helpful.

I’m sure you’re happy enough to use the paint your daughter’s chosen and advise about the best sort of cot. You sound as though you’ll be a pretty good babysitter – and more.

But there are some things you really can’t get involved with, beyond a simple: “Oh, really? How nice”. And names are high on that list.

Actually, my taste in names has changed, not just over my lifetime – my preferences even shifted over the time that I was having my children.

I’m sure you can think of names you loved when you were a child always find things to tease one another about.

And a glance down any contemporary school register will reveal some amazing names!

In some ways, I suspect your reaction to this issue is based on wanting to be ultra-involved. Nothing wrong with that, but knowing when to step back is something we grandmothers have to learn very early on.

You’ll be an invaluable source of advice, support and love, but while you can give support and love unasked, you do have to wait to give advice.

Within moments of your grandchild’s birth, her name will seem just as lovely as everything else about her.

In fact, the only name you should really be thinking about now is what your grandchildren are going to call you.