THE FAMILY SPUD

A family of Irish potatoes – a mother and her three daughters – are sitting at the dinner table one night when the eldest daughter speaks up. “Mother, I’ve got big news,” she says. “What is it?” her mother says. “I’m going to get married!” “Oh, are you now? And who are you going to marry?” “I’m going to marry Irish Red.” “Oh that’s a fine tater, a very fine tater indeed.” Then the middle daughter speaks up. “I’ve got big news too, mother,” she says. “What is it?” her mother says. “I’m going to get married too!” “Oh, are you now? And who are you going to marry?” “I’m going to marry Idaho Gold.” “Oh, Idaho Gold – that’s a fine tater, a very fine tater indeed.”

Then the youngest daughter, no more than a child, speaks up. “Mother, I’ve got big news too,” she says. “Oh, do you now?” her mother says. “Oh yes. I’m going to get married too!” “Oh, are you now? And who are you going to marry?”

“I’m going to marry that man whose voice you hear when we watch football.” The mother is perturbed. “But sweetie,” she says, “that man is just a common tater!”