ILLNESS AS AN INITIATION
Several years ago I wrote a book on the soul of medicine, and in the research phase I interviewed many healthcare workers and patients.
One of the things that struck me most in talking to patients was a common sentiment. Many wished they didn’t have to go through the pain and anxiety of illness, but at the same time they said it was the best thing that could have happened to them. Being sick forced them to reconsider their lives, especially the way they spent their time and how they handled their relationships.
After having a taste of mortality, they felt the need to change and make life count. They sensed the preciousness of every day and saw past the minor issues in their marriages and families to the priceless value of those relationships. They felt they became better people because of their illnesses.
Whenever I pass a hospital at night and notice the lights in the windows I think of all the people lying there, thinking and feeling and wondering.
They are incubating their illnesses into their souls. That quiet time is important. It’s an opportunity for people to take in what they’re experiencing and let their imaginations wander through all sorts of thoughts and concerns.
In this process they are becoming persons, making discoveries, and being transformed by their experience.
What are the sicknesses of soul that can translate into physical problems?
A big one is anxiety. Many people are frantic most of the time while trying to keep up with their busy lives.
You can be active without giving up periods of relaxation. Find resources that work for you. I do puzzles, listen to music, watch old black-and-white movies, play golf, play the piano, read detective stories and go for walks.
Various forms of meditation and yoga can also help you relax your body and mind. I’m asking you to take relaxation seriously. Notice if your muscles are tense, your mind is racing or your emotions are frazzled. Do something about it. Take a bath. Go for a walk.
In the end, the most effective way of dealing with ageing is to be exactly who you are. Don’t try to avoid ageing by imagining how it could be otherwise.
Don’t think about people younger than you being better off. Don’t wish for your youth back. Don’t deny the negative aspects of ageing. Be exactly who you are and exactly what age you are.
We end with the paradox of paradoxes: you age best by embracing your age, with suitable melancholy, and at the same time choosing to live without age, ageless, with as much joy as you can muster.
This requires that you understand you’re not your body, you’re not the sum of your experiences and you’re not as restricted by time as you may have thought.
You have a soul, the river of vitality from which your life flows, a tributary of a much grander soul of the world. Your soul is there at every moment of experience in time, but it is also ageless.
Find resources that work for you