I WANT A DIVORCE BUT I’M AFRAID

Q I’m contemplating getting a divorce as my husband keeps cheating on me. Every time I catch him out he simply says he’s sorry and won’t do it again – but then he just carries on. He’s wealthy and when I met him he’d already been through one divorce and had to pay a lot of money to his ex-wife – so he told me he’ll make sure it never happens again.

We have a 10-year-old daughter and it’s important to me that I can take care of her if I leave him as I’m not working and will need to look for employment.

I know he’s put all his money in trusts of which I’m not a trustee. So I’m afraid that if I get divorced, I’ll walk away with no money and my daughter and I will suffer. He’s not a good father, so I know I can’t rely on him caring enough for his daughter to provide for her. What do I do? Anonymous, email

A You need to consult with an experienced divorce attorney who also has experience in cases involving trust funds. Trust funds can be complex as it all depends on how the trust is set up.

Coping with your husband’s continuous infidelities must be difficult – not only because of the heartbreak but also because it can have implications for your health if he doesn’t take the necessary precautions with his mistresses.

Before you speak to your husband about divorce, consult with the divorce attorney so that you know exactly where you stand in terms of custody, maintenance, alimony and so on. Be aware that once you file for divorce or even tell your husband you’re contemplating divorce, he’ll probably try to hide some of his assets. His previous divorce most likely taught him a few tricks, so you need a proper strategy.

As for your concern about his not providing for your daughter, as her biological father he has a legal obligation to take care of her and this will be enforced by the court.